VP: What's the name of the company I'm thinking of? We've got a job with them.
Engineer: Starts with…?
VP: A. A something. Aaaaaaa…
Engineer: Ass-fuckers anonymous?
VP, quietly: Ass-fuckers anonymous… Ass…
Engineer: Yeah, AFA, but trust me, it's not that. I just made that up.
VP, very loudly: Ass-fuckers anonymous!?
Engineer: Dude, can you not yell “ass-fuckers anonymous” when I'm in your office?
Paterson, New Jersey
Receptionist #1: Where's Linda today?
Receptionist #2: She's gonna be out for a while, she's having surgery on her thyroid.
Dentist: I didn't even know she had a thyroid.
Bayside, New York
Manager giving out hot dogs at company picnic: Why don't you pry open your buns there so I can slide my meat in?
Milton Mall
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: amused worker
Foreign coworker: What is a ‘jigga’?
Male coworker: I don’t know, I’m Turkish.
Female coworker: I don’t know, I’m White.
44th Street and 5th Avenue
New York, New York
Temp: So the seal was playing a wind instrument?
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Coworker #1: So, what is a Thai roll?
Coworker #2: Well, Thailand is a country…
Coworker #3, laughing: Oops, I just farted…I laughed so hard a fart came out.
Bethpage, New York
Overheard by: Gette
Female CSR #1: Did you get a brownie?
Slightly-larger female CSR: No, I can’t leave my desk and work to get a brownie. That would be brushing off my duties.
Female CSR #1: Well, I’m not a fat person. I wouldn’t know.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon
Male coworker: You should send the calls to the UK, since they'll be open tomorrow. They don't celebrate Thanksgiving. Who else will be working tomorrow?
Female coworker: Jewish people. No…wait, that's Christmas.
St. Paul, Minnesota
