Soccer mom #1 in line, handing another $100: Here, this isn't a loan.
Soccer mom #2: Why? No sympathy for me! I had money last week, I just spent it on drugs and liquor.
Soccer mom #1: Well, maybe you'll share next time. Take it.
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Tel-ler it like it is
Son to mom: Who are the Harlem Globetrotters?
Mom: They're the guys that do tricks with their balls.
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: Super Bob
Coworker: Your baby is *so* adorable and scrumptious.
New mom: Yeah, Susie said she could eat her with some hot sauce.
Coworker: Wow, I didn't know Susie liked hot sauce.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Young boy: Look, daddy, there's the big dicks! Yesterday we saw the small dicks and today we seen the big dicks. Which do you like better, daddy, the small dicks or the big dicks?
Father: I prefer the big dicks, but don't tell your mother.
Johnson City, Tennessee
Overheard by: only if this were Victoria Secrets
Father mechanic: You sound like your mother.
Son mechanic: Yeah, but I'm not throwing an iron at you. Or a dictionary.
Father mechanic: I loved her until then.
Car Dealership
Oakville, Ontario
Canadia
Bookseller in children's department: Can I help you find anything?
Mother: Has CS Lewis written anything new lately?
Tuscaloosa, Alabama
Loud mother, entering lingerie department holding hand of 11-year-old daughter: Can you tell me where your smallest training bras are? And I mean the smallest!
Chestnut Hill Macy's
Boston, Massachusetts
Coworker on the phone with her daughter: The days of getting free stuff just because you’re cute are over.
County School Office
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Someone who’s convinced those days are never over
Psycho parent: Look, you’re not in his resource time, so he can’t get help from you then.
Teacher: Yes, well, I’m teaching another class, so I can’t be there.
Psycho parent: I know it’s not your fault, but don’t you feel like you should take some responsibility for that?
High school
Sterling, Virginia
