Cubicle drone on phone: So not only is it wild, but it's attached itself to you?
Plains, Pennsylvania
Cubicle drone on phone: So not only is it wild, but it's attached itself to you?
Plains, Pennsylvania
Peon, answering phone: Hello, XYZ* architects.
Caller: I'm from universal healthcare, is Mr. Smith* in?
Peon: No. I'm sorry, but he's retired.
Caller: Okay, but is he in?
Peon: No, he's retired.
Caller: Right, you said that, but is he in?
Peon: Do you not know what “retired” means?
Caller: I guess not.
Ybor City, Florida
Black suit on cell: Lemme get this straight — she filed a restraining order against you and you’re still calling her and sending her flowers? That ain’t love, man. That’s… insanity.
Montgomery, Alabama
Overheard by: Kim
Coworker, on cell: I'm sorry, she's passed away. (pause) She's passed away. (pause) She's dead.
Baltimore, Maryland
Guy introducing guest speaker at conference: Just a reminder: if you have a vibrator or cell phone, please turn it off now.
Richmond, Indiana
Secretary on phone: I hate fake tans too…not cans…tans. No, tans. T as in taco, A as in anus, N as in next, and S as in swords. I hate fake cans, too.
3818 Maccorkle Avenue SE
Charleston, West Virginia
Overheard by: brittany
Cubicle-dweller, on phone: I think they might be swingers.
Piscataway, New Jersey
Overheard by: Tom
Sales guy on phone: Yeah, we need to quantitate that. Mmm-hmmm. Well, I can’t make ends meet of this spreadsheet.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Manager on phone: Yes sir, I'm aware that the auto-message is in two different voices. No sir, I did not think that people would be confused…I'm sorry you feel that way, sir.
Barnes & Noble
Greenfield, Wisconsin
Overheard by: darkhorse
Coworker on cell: I just don't understand bro, what do you need a real human head for?
Baltimore, Maryland
