Newbie: It's been a long day. A long week, actually.
Senior: It's been a long eight years for me.
Newbie: Wow. How are you still alive?
Senior: I don't know. I'm a soul survivor.
Newbie: Like that Rolling Stones song? Did they write that after you?
Senior: Yep. I'm the only one who can survive in this place.
Bayonne, New Jersey
Boss, singing to well-known Disney tune: One day… My prince will come! …And stick it up my bum…
Birkenhead
England
Overheard by: No longer a Disney fan
Chairman of meeting: So we now have the new theme for next year's Christmas concert. It's going to be called “night of glory.”
Student representative, under her breath: Walk of shame.
Decorah, Iowa
Overheard by: Not allowed to vote in meetings
Property manager to coworker playing soft Celtic music: What is this music? Have we joined a monastery? It makes me want to slit my wrists!
Seattle, Washington
Hipster teen on phone: Oh, that was awesome! Like a combination of Fergie and Jesus!
Barnes & Noble
Greenfield, Wisconsin
Overheard by: darkhorse
Dispatcher #1: Do you like that Ford truck country singer guy?
Dispatcher #2: Who, Toby Keith? I can't stand that guy, he makes my testosterone boil!
Dispatcher #3: Does that hurt?
Salt Lake City, Utah
Producer: Have you ever heard the South Park song about finger-bangin?
Assistant: The only song I heard today was “I'm at a gay bar.”
Producer: Well, it happens there, too…
Hollywood, California
Woman sipping her soda through a straw, the day after the super bowl: If I suck hard enough, will Justin Timberlake come?
Lincoln Village Drive
Rancho Cordova, California
Overheard by: That’s What She Said
Coworker #1: When I was at the hospital, they had this harp player that went around the hospital and played.
Coworker #2: Uh, are you sure they had a harp player? You may have just been on the brink of death, you know.
Dacula, Georgia
Girl #1: That's the last time I ever play the tuba!
Girl #2: At least not with make up on!
Bloomington, Illinois
