It’s Too Late to Save This Conversation

Straight guy #1: Are we actually watching the Ellen DeGeneres Show?
Straight guy #2: It’s just on.
Straight guy #3: I think she’s hot.
Straight guy #2: Ellen DeGeneres is hot?
Straight guy #3: Yeah.
Straight guy #2: I saw her in real life once.
Straight guy #3: Yeah, where?
Straight guy #2: I was in a lesbian disco in West Hollywood.
Straight guy #3: Wait, she’s gay?
Straight guy #2: Ellen? Are you kidding?
Straight guy #3: Oh, I thought we were talking about Rachael Ray.

1260 Library Street
Detroit, Michigan

Overheard by: little*bit

Posted on December 20, 2025
Coworkers, Gossip, Michigan

I Get Hungry in There

Employee: What are you doing tonight?
Manager: I have to pick up a turkey and then get a CAT scan.

140 River’s Edge Drive
Traverse City, Michigan

Posted on December 14, 2025
Bosses and Underlings, Meals and Snacks, Michigan

So How Far Is That From Maryland?

Woman: I want to send a money order.
Teller: Is it going out of state?
Woman: No. It’s not.
Teller: Where are you sending it?
Woman: Chicago.
Teller: That’s out of state.
Woman: It is?!

Bank
Southfield, Michigan

Overheard by: Next in line

Posted on July 31, 2025
Dumb Customers, General Idiocy, Michigan

Miss Anna Phylactic’s Shocking Lunch

Young lady: Are there nuts in the apple walnut salad?
Dining companion, sarcastically: No, it’s a new type of apple.
Young lady: Good, because I’m allergic to nuts, and I really want that salad.
Waiter: Do you want the half salad or the whole?

858 Tittabawassee Road
Saginaw, Michigan

Overheard by: Herodotus420

Posted on July 18, 2025
Dumb Customers, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Meals and Snacks, Michigan

12PM Lunch

Male bank teller: I’m winning the Mega Millions tonight.
Female bank teller: I’m getting a brace for my leg.
Male teller: Screw that brace. When I win the Mega Millions we’ll get you a new leg! We’ll just cut that one off and I’ll get you a prostate.

725 East Big Beaver Road
Troy, Michigan

Posted on March 1, 2025
Admins, Body Parts, Coworkers, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Michigan

11AM Monitor Calls

CSR on phone: Okay, I’m sending a trouble ticket up for investigation on that for you. Here’s the ticket number in case you want to call and yell at us.

4800 Concentric Boulevard
Saginaw, Michigan

Posted on January 29, 2025
Customer Service, Gripes, Insults, Michigan, Offers and requests

3PM Smoke Break

Peon #1: Why is Laura gone already?
Peon #2: She had some medical stuff done today, I believe through the rectum, so she went home.

1441 West Long Lake Road
Troy, Michigan

Posted on January 18, 2025
Body Parts, Employees, Gossip, Health & Hygiene, Michigan, Time Management

4PM Update Resume

Co-worker #1: I have my big meeting tomorrow.
Co-worker #2: What meeting?
Co-worker #1: You know! The meeting where I’m going to stand up and say, “Fuck this! I quit!”

122 South Main Street
Ann Arbor, Michigan

Posted on November 13, 2024
Coworkers, Hiring & Firing, Meetings, Michigan

4PM Mail Thank You Notes

Employee #1: I don’t know what to write.
Employee #2: How about, “I’m surprised you cheap skanks chipped in ten bucks a piece”?
Employee #1: …I was thinking more, “I am sure I will get a lot of use out of this.”

327 West Michigan Avenue
Kalamazoo, Michigan

Posted on October 16, 2024
Advice, Employees, Gripes, Michigan, Money, Questions

3PM Coffee Break

Co-worker #1: Man, it’s freezing outside.
Co-worker #2: My outside thermometer says it’s 83 degrees.
Co-worker #3: Maybe it’s in metrics or something.

1345 Monroe Avenue NW
Grand Rapids, Michigan

Posted on October 15, 2024
Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Michigan