Coworker to another: Give him he meat. That's what he wants.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Dina
Coworker to another: Give him he meat. That's what he wants.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Dina
Manager: I'm going to go take my break now. I have to feed my fat roll.
Borthwick Avenue
Portsmouth, New Hampshire
Overheard by: I have one too
Man on phone: Okay, so I heard you have a raccoon in your freezer.
[Pause]Man on phone: How did it get there?
[Pause]Man on phone: Did you kill it? What do you plan do with its body? What do you mean no one wants it?
S. Sycamore Street
Elizabethton
Tennessee
Overheard by: concerned for the racoon
Police officer (signing to the tune of Animal Crackers in My Soup): I like maggots in my soup…
Police Department
Randolph, New Jersey
Loud office chick: You're growing new bones in your body! You have to drink milk!
Hudson Street
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Accountant: Why did you switch from coffee to green tea?
Analyst: Tea is easier on my throat and it has more antioxidants.
Accountant: What are antioxidants?
Analyst: They keep me from having oxidants…Come on! That’s funny, dammit!
100 East Rivercenter Boulevard
Covington, Kentucky
Employee sitting at lunch table: Dude, this pepper shaker does not fuck around. It is amazing.
Portland, Oregon
Receptionist to office worker, carrying two bags of crushed Dr. Pepper cans: Oh my god! Are all those yours?
Office worker: Yep! Gotta hide the evidence of my addiction.
Receptionist: A Dr. Pepper addiction. I haven't seen one of those since I was a Mormon.
Santa Rosa, California
Office guy #1: Does anyone know of, like, a Mexican dessert?
Office guy #2: Why?
Office guy #1: Oh, my wife is having a Mexican-themed party and I have to think of a dessert.
Office guy #3: Flan? I think that is Mexican. I don’t know what it is, though…
Office gal: Flan is nasty. It has a nasty texture. Flan is like the texture of a rotten cooter.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: I don’t like flan either…
Manager: Do you remember the cartoon where they hold the dog down and pour gravy down its throat? Great cartoon, that.
Melbourne
Australia
