Office worker #1: I'm so damn hungry, I need real food.
Office worker #2: Yeah, I can imagine that liquid diet wouldn't be too filling or satisfying.
Office worker #2: I feel like I'm an African refugee.
Chantilly, Virginia
Office worker #1: I'm so damn hungry, I need real food.
Office worker #2: Yeah, I can imagine that liquid diet wouldn't be too filling or satisfying.
Office worker #2: I feel like I'm an African refugee.
Chantilly, Virginia
Doctor #1: I always say, “Carrots are like sandpaper for the colon.”
Doctor #2: Yeah, see, most people I know just eat them.
1500 East Medical Center Drive
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Coworker, walking into break room: Something smells fishy…
Ditzy blonde coworker with freshly nuked boxed lunch: Well, it can't be me, mine's chicken. (reads label on box) Oh, wait, mine is fish…
Castle Rock, Colorado
Overheard by: Sparky
Jenn: Oh my god, Anne, I can smell that from here!
(everyone in cubicles around Jenn and Anne look up at Anne)
Anne (looking horrified): I'm peeling an orange! She's smelling my orange!
Kent Street
Sydney, New South Wales
Australia
Office girl #1: Obviously, I just brewed coffee, right? So of course she has to be the first to get some. Well, I walk into the kitchen and she's facing the freezer with the freezer door open, and she has the coffee pot up to her nose, and she's smelling it. I have no idea what the hell was going on.
Office girl #2: What the eff?
Office girl #1: Yeah… I'm thinking that maybe… No, no, I really have no idea.
Sacramento, California
Office Manager: How do you go out to lunch and come back with a huge cucumber?
Employee: How do men go out at night and come back with hookers?
Office Manager: Huh?
Employee: It’s the same basic principle.
110 N. Washington Street
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: Joan
Man on phone: Man I saw plenty of dogs in Shanghai, and I gotta tell you they weren't eating them!
Chinatown
Washington, DC
President yelling at CFO: You eat an elephant one bite at a time, but we're trying to swallow it whole and we're starting with the tusks!
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
Server: Are you ready?
Customer: I don’t know what I want. What do you like?
Server: When the customer makes up his mind and orders.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: I Like the Grilled Tuna
IT manager: I wish I worked in HR, they're always either eating cake or firing people.
New York City, New York
