Language barrier

1PM Lunch

Intern: So yeah, the first twenty minutes I was just sitting next to him in the breakroom I didn’t say a single word.
Engineer: Does he freak you out that much?
Intern: Well no, I just thought he didn’t speak any English.
Engineer: So you finally said something?
Intern: Yeah, I tried to make some small talk by asking what cubicle he sits in. But he spent the next 5-10 minutes trying to explain.
Engineer: He’s not that bad at English…
Intern: I don’t know. He kept asking what direction was North. By the time I made him point to it, I wished I never said anything. Seriously, what do cardinal directions have to do with your cubicle?

41131 Vincenti Court
Novi, Michigan

Ten Bucks Says He's the Boss.

Coworker: So this e-mail came in, in Dutch writing, so how would I find out if it came from Australia?

Call Center
Northeast Pennsylvania

But I Was Busy Refilling Clarissa

Coworker staring at beeping microwave: I heard you the first time, Fran.

220 West 3rd Street
Denver, Colorado

Jaguar: Ironically, My Married Name Is ‘Lion’

Young girl: Mr. Lion! Hello, Mr. Lion!
Mom: I think that’s a jaguar.
Young girl: Hello, Mr. Lion!
Mom: That’s not a lion, sweetie, that’s a jaguar.
Young girl: Okay, mom, but I can’t say that word. Mr. Lion!

Woodland Park Zoo
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: James

Because If So, Yes

Office drone #1: Have you ever been to Chinatown for dim sum?
Office drone #2: Is that a drug?

Chicago, Illinois

What Happens When You’re Von Trapped in an Office

Team leader: Alright everyone, I’m headed out for the weekend. So long.
Teammate #1: Farewell.
Teammate #2: Auf wiedersehen.
Teammate #3: Goodbye!

Hanover, Maryland

Overheard by: Adam

Cuban Business Customs: The Short Course

Canadian: Is there anything I should know about Cuban business customs before we get started?
Translator: No.

Girl with tray of espressos walks in and hands one to each person.

Canadian: I don’t drink coffee.
Translator: You do today.

Cuban Health Ministry
Havana, Cuba

Overheard by: Drank the coffee

It’s All in My GlyphsNotes

Student: Yeah, my name is Frank, but I go by Franco, only the ‘O’ isn’t an ‘O,’ it’s a sun glyph.

NIC, CDA
Idaho

The Awful Cost of Gays in the Military

Boss storming through office: Fuck those idiots! They couldn’t sell pussy to a troop train!
New girl: What about a train? [Long pause] And did he just say ‘pussy’?

Norfolk, Virginia

Overheard by: On the laugh train…

3PM Court

Bailiff: Okay, I think we need a Jewish interpreter over here! What did you say? Hay broo? Okay, whatever.

141 Livingston Street
Brooklyn, New York

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