Teacher: Can you say, ‘Open the door’ in Spanish?
Preschooler: Open the door in Spanish.
Learning center
Bloomington, Indiana
Teacher: Can you say, ‘Open the door’ in Spanish?
Preschooler: Open the door in Spanish.
Learning center
Bloomington, Indiana
Boss: I hate these burritos. The ingredients aren’t mixed up at all. It’s like a fetus they mangled into a tortilla.
North Meridian Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Developer
Boss : What is that red thing on top of a rooster’s head called? I can’t find a description anywhere on the Internet.
Employee: Just Google ‘cock’ and ‘diagram.’
Bloomington, Indiana
Overheard by: Sailorette
Woman on phone: Uhhuh… Well, we just have to learn how not to be child molesters.
Walnut Street
Evansville, Indiana
School social worker, to kindergartner on lap: So what happened right before you ran out of your classroom?
Kindergartner: I’m peeing.
Social worker: What do you mean, you’re peeing?
Kindergartner: I’m peeing.
Social worker: [jumps up, displaying huge wet spot on her pants]Kindergartner: I TOLD you I was peeing.
5130 Roxbury Road
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Fair warning given
Neurologist: Okay, well, Tim…the bathroom's right around the corner. Why don't you head in there and go as much as you can? Then Carol will come in and take a picture.
Shelbyville, Indiana
Overheard by: Confused at the Neurologist
Coworker #1: Has anyone ever been to Hoover Dam?
Coworker #2: No, but I hear that the Canadian side is much better than the American side.
Pendleton, Indiana
Overheard by: Watching for invading Canadians
Two-year-old girl: Up, Daddy.
Dad: No.
Two-year-old girl: Up, Daddy… P’ease?
Dad: No. C’mon, we taught you how to walk for a goddamned reason. Let’s move it.
Target
Avon, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Cube dweller #1: Hey, I’m a people person.
Cube dweller #2: What are you talking about? You’re a make-fun-of-people person!
1000 East 116th Street
Carmel, Indiana
Office Manager: It’s like apples and oranges: they are all the same.
15530 Herriman Boulevard
Noblesville, Indiana
