Clerk: Hey, man, y'all ever heard of Ms. Brady*, teacher at the middle school?
Guy: Yeah–I know her–big butt Brady*!
Clerk, scowling: Uhhh–that's my momma.
Convinence Store
South Mississippi
Overheard by: Mississippi Girl
Clerk: Hey, man, y'all ever heard of Ms. Brady*, teacher at the middle school?
Guy: Yeah–I know her–big butt Brady*!
Clerk, scowling: Uhhh–that's my momma.
Convinence Store
South Mississippi
Overheard by: Mississippi Girl
Dude: My brother is the Rasputin of the welding industry.
Elevator
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Jas
Attorney: An Interested Party is any board member who receives, or whose spouse or descendants receives, financial gain from the corporation.
Board member: So if my son works here, then I’m not an Interested Party.
Attorney: Your son is your descendant.
Board member: Are you sure?
1524 North Santa Fe Avenue
Vista, California
Coworker #1, reading news headlines: Mother of 550-pound teenager has been charged with neglect.
Coworker #2: That's ridiculous, obviously the kid is well fed.
The Woodlands, Texas
Overheard by: Jeremy
First-time father of twins to female coworker: So, when do newborns open their eyes?
Coworker: Um…it's not like kittens, babies are born with their eyes open.
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Dea at work
Receptionist on phone, about sister's recent miscarriage: It's because she's a pill-popper. And she still smokes weed. The methadone was okay, though, because a lot of pregnant women do that.
Springfield, Massachusetts
Female coworker: I love Hawaii, been there four times already.
Male coworker: Oh, so you like to travel a lot?
Female coworker: No, I go to Hawaii to visit my sister, it's not like I'm a member of the mile high club or anything.
Long Island City, New York
Overheard by: oh no u didn't
Coworker #1 to 20-something coworker: I will boss you. I'm old enough to be your mother, and I will boss you.
Coworker #2, joining in: And I'm old enough to be your grandmother.
Coworker #1: And we will box your ears together.
(a few minutes later)
Coworker #1: Someday you're going to get married, so you might as well get used to being bossed around.
West Lafayette, Indiana
Overheard by: Rachel S.
Coworker #1: St. Patrick's Day is my favorite holiday. I'm 100% Irish!
Coworker #2: Oh yeah?
Coworker #1: Yeah, especially on my dad's side. He's Irish, Scottish, and Welsh.
Coworker #2: Well, then you're not 100% Irish.
Coworker #1: Yes, I am.
Coworker #2: No, you're not. You're…
Coworker #1: Yes I am. I am 100% Irish.
Coworker #2: Whatever, man.
Coworker #1: The Irish are stubborn, you know.
Phoenix, Arizona
Receptionist to clerk: Kitty just brought one of those little hybrid cars that get a thousand miles to the gallon. How the hell does she plan to get her big fat Oompa-Loompa children crammed into that little thing?
Kitty, walking into office: Are you guys talking about the Willy Wonka movie? My kids just love those candy bars they sell at the dollar store!
Orlando, Florida
