Sign: Don't Bother the Employees at Feeding Time

Cube monkey, eating alone at desk and coughing: Quit trying to eat yourself!

Overland Park, Kansas

Posted on October 16, 2017
Employees, Health & Hygiene, Kansas, Meals and Snacks, Weirdness

…Taters?

Male cube rat #1: What was that guy's name you just hung up with?
(simultaneously)
Male cube rat #2: What are you doing for lunch?
Female cube rat: Dick.

New York City, New York

Posted on October 14, 2017
Coworkers, Cubicles, Default, Employees, Names, New York, Questions, Sexuality

Every Episode Of Real Housewives Of NYC, in a Nutshell.

Employee #1, walking into kitchen: Oh look, it's the two people in this office I hate the most.
Employee #2: Good, I think you should get upset and leave.

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: tbomb

Posted on October 10, 2017
Compare and contrast, Employees, Feelings, Gripes, New York

I Asked You First

Customer: How many pieces of chicken are in the 12-piece meal?
Employee: Are you fucking with me?

Thornton, Colorado

Posted on October 9, 2017
Colorado, Customers, Employees, General Idiocy, Insults, Meals and Snacks, Questions

If You Can't Handle Humiliation, Don't Drink With the Kids

Guy in cubicle: Those kids put me on cyberspace. I was at this party doing shots with the kids until three in the morning. They took my picture and put it up on the internet. Now there's some Japanese people laughing at me. Why the hell would I join a social networking site? I don't need that. I hate people.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on September 10, 2017
Employees, Feelings, Gripes, Internet, Pennsylvania

Yes.

Office guy to accounts manager: Hey dude, what are you munching on?
Effeminate gay guy, with attitude: Would you believe he just came in here and starting eating my nuts?

The Bahamas

Overheard by: dG

Posted on September 6, 2017
Body Parts, Caribbean, Employees, Gays and lesbians, Questions, Words

My Moist Hands Will Be No Match for Their Dry Wit!

Burly custodial guy, spotting hand lotion in office break room: Oooh, jasmine! (puts some on his hands) The boys are going to be laughing at me today!

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: calgon, take me away

Posted on September 5, 2017
Employees, Health & Hygiene, Sensory Experiences, Washington, Weirdness

And Sometimes a Boob-Squeeze As a Holiday Bonus

Cashier to saleswoman holding a box of sweets: Hey! Why didn't I get a box of sweets?
Saleswoman: Because your title isn't “manager”. He gets a hug, and maybe a little pinch on the tushy.

Bedford, New York

Overheard by: Black Friday Shopper

Posted on August 19, 2017
Body Parts, Employees, Meals and Snacks, New York, Office Politics, Possible Sexual Harassment, Questions, Sales

Don't Act Like This Isn't in Your Job Description

Editor, about to show tv show to office before lay-off: Okay, are you ready?
Production assistant: Yeah, what am I looking for again?
Editor: Um, Pastease… Ass cracks and nipples.

Chappaqua, New York

Posted on July 24, 2017
Body Parts, Clothes, Employees, New York, Questions, Sexuality, Writers and Editors

Why “Can I Help You With Anything?” Can Be a Dangerous Question.

Large effeminate guy with German accent: These are the metallic pencils you do not have! (waves crayola box at employee)
Employee: Okay… Sir?
German guy: Do you know vat I am making? A portrait of Al Pacino! To really capture his manliness! Once I did a picture in charcoal but my art teacher said to really get the effect, I vould haf to burn it!

Joann's Fabrics
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: manybellsdown

Posted on July 22, 2017
Arts, California, Customers, Employees, Gripes, Pop culture, Weirdness