EVP at copier, yawning: Ohhhhh… Monkey. (walks away)
Marlborough, Massachusetts
EVP at copier, yawning: Ohhhhh… Monkey. (walks away)
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Cube monkey, eating alone at desk and coughing: Quit trying to eat yourself!
Overland Park, Kansas
Employee #1, walking into kitchen: Oh look, it's the two people in this office I hate the most.
Employee #2: Good, I think you should get upset and leave.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: tbomb
Customer: How many pieces of chicken are in the 12-piece meal?
Employee: Are you fucking with me?
Thornton, Colorado
Guy in cubicle: Those kids put me on cyberspace. I was at this party doing shots with the kids until three in the morning. They took my picture and put it up on the internet. Now there's some Japanese people laughing at me. Why the hell would I join a social networking site? I don't need that. I hate people.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Office guy to accounts manager: Hey dude, what are you munching on?
Effeminate gay guy, with attitude: Would you believe he just came in here and starting eating my nuts?
The Bahamas
Overheard by: dG
Burly custodial guy, spotting hand lotion in office break room: Oooh, jasmine! (puts some on his hands) The boys are going to be laughing at me today!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: calgon, take me away
Cashier to saleswoman holding a box of sweets: Hey! Why didn't I get a box of sweets?
Saleswoman: Because your title isn't “manager”. He gets a hug, and maybe a little pinch on the tushy.
Bedford, New York
Overheard by: Black Friday Shopper
Editor, about to show tv show to office before lay-off: Okay, are you ready?
Production assistant: Yeah, what am I looking for again?
Editor: Um, Pastease… Ass cracks and nipples.
Chappaqua, New York
