Guy: Hey, can you tell me how to get to Billings, Montana?
Desk clerk: Yeah, just go north on 95, then east on 90. That’s the best way to get there.
Guy: Thanks! I just got fired. I’m a carnie. Carnie!
Hillcrest
Moscow, Idaho
Overheard by: They have small hands.
Cube dweller: Where are my pretzels? I just feel like putting stuff in my mouth.
Scotts Valley, California
Overheard by: Mari
Sweet-natured office chick: I’m starting to realize I’m just a selfish little bitch, and now I’m much, much happier!
Centre Street
New York, New York
Locksmith: Yeah, you gotta read “1994.” Orson Welles. Really knows his stuff. Everything he wrote in that book is happening right now. You gotta read it.
Sherman Oaks, California
Overheard by: Ja'mie
Customer: I think you're making that up.
Employee: I think you're trespassing.
Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia
Casting assistant: …I mean… If you’re not going to type your letter, you might want to make sure that your handwriting doesn’t make you look like a serial killer.
Diamond Street
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: Tigertail
Girl, yelling from her cubicle: Ewww, gross! There's hair and a birthmark!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Zack
Female suit to employee: I'm a weird person and I'm in a weird mood today, so you'd think they'd cancel each other out.
Iowa City, Iowa
Black FedEx guy: You married yet?
White banker guy: Haven't met the right girl yet.
Black FedEx guy: There are no white girls!
Banker guy: No right girl.
Black FedEx guy: There are no right girls either. You just got to pick one and marry them and have some kids, that's what I did.
Midtown
New York City, New York
Overheard by: CDog
