Helpful librarian: Here is an explanation of the changes a boy goes through, and masturbation.
Shocked redfaced teen: No, I said books on emancipation!
Ceres, California
Helpful librarian: Here is an explanation of the changes a boy goes through, and masturbation.
Shocked redfaced teen: No, I said books on emancipation!
Ceres, California
Boss, sending a sick employee home: You are so stubborn, I told you not to come in today.
Employee: I didn’t know I was sick, I just thought I didn’t feel good.
Long Beach, California
Guy at sink to guy at urinal: Any more than two shakes and you’re jerking off.
Men’s room, 14 Penn Plaza
New York, New York
Action officer: Nothing like making fun of the blind to get your morning started.
The Pentagon
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Propagandist
Older lady to another: Hey, chuckles, you fucking ready yet?
Bridgeport, Connecticut
Employee #1: I don’t understand what his problem is…
Employee #2: His problem? He’s low-level and he’s stupid.
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: CB
Boss: Okay, it's crunch time! Everyone has to get to work to get this shipment through! Come on, I don't want to see anyone slacking! (points to employee #1) You! What are you doing?
Employee #1: Working.
Boss: Good! You! (points to employee #2) What are you doing?
Employee #2: Working…
Boss: Great! You! (points to employee #3) What are you doing? (pause) Seriously, what are you doing?
Employee #3: Wasting company money. Surfing the net. You know.
Boss: Carry on!
Employee #1: Well, we know someone is sleeping with him!
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Not the Employee 4 you're looking for…
Manager: Who do I have to talk to to get you tasked to my project?
Engineer: I don't know… it's kind of complicated.
Manager: Well, can you draw me an org chart or something?
Engineer, sheepishly: Not without using fractals.
Roanoke, Virginia
Overheard by: Smartass
Sales agent: She can kiss my butt!
Manager: Oh, speaking of which…
Beacon Street
Newton, Massachusetts
Woman (after manager jokingly pats her on the back): Hey, don’t be coming in here hitting me!
Manager: No, no, I wouldn’t do that. I haven’t hit a woman in a long time. You know when the last time I hit a woman was? It was my ex-wife, and it was goooooood. I spent two days in jail, but it was worth it. It was soooo worth it. They had to wire her jaw shut. Six weeks. Six weeks of silence.
Woman: That’s nice, but could you leave now, please?”
Wilmington, North Carolina
