Co-worker on phone: Yeah, she was really sick. She was vomiting, and throwing up, and barfing, and everything else.
Washington Street
St. Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: KC
Co-worker on phone: Yeah, she was really sick. She was vomiting, and throwing up, and barfing, and everything else.
Washington Street
St. Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: KC
Male cube dweller: Isn’t that the church where they had the wet t-shirt contest?
Female cube dweller: That was a baptism!
Male cube dweller: Oh…
McLean, Virginia
Cashier #1, trying to unlock a drawer at the front desk: I… Can’t… Get… The key… To work.
Cashier #2, who recently found out he got his booty-call pregnant: You have to jiggle it, and then pull it out.
Cashier #1, laughing: Cause that has worked so well for you in the past.
Grocery Store
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Loves It!!
Female workbee #1: *Dan takes this rubber cockroach and tosses it over into *Linda’s cubicle. She just freaks and goes running out of the building screaming at the top of her lungs.
Female workbee #2: Do you know if anyone ate her donut?
City Offices
Houston, Texas
Sales guy #1: What’s going on in the break room?
Sales guy #2: What? Why do you ask?
Sales guy #1: The door is closed.
Sales guy #2: Well, someone’s getting their butt chewed out or they’ve got cake in there! It’s one or the other!
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Brunette girl #1: So I was in bed for like, a whole week.
Brunette girl #2: Because your vagina was broken?
Brunette girl #1: Yeah…
Lords Valley, Pennsylvania
Coworker #1: He couldn’t get it up?
Coworker #2: No, he couldn’t get hard.
Coworker #1: Wow, I can at least get hard.
Coworker #2: It was his first shoot. They gave him Viagra and energy drinks and the girl sucked and rubbed him for an hour but he couldn’t get hard. Then the director fired him and asked if anyone if could keep it hard for two hours.
Coworker #1: Did you volunteer?
Coworker #2: No, I can stay hard for an hour but not two. But a cameraman did. I felt bad for the girl, she was just 18 and it was her first shoot and the cameraman was like 60.
Coworker #1: Damn. I wish I hadn’t called in sick.
Porn Shoot
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: she was ugly
Ditzy customer service rep #1: Isn’t there a country where they read right to left?
Ditzy customer service rep #2: Oh, yeah, isn’t that England?
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Way Underpaid HR Manager
Manager of consultant team: Okay everyone, we’re going into the office tomorrow.
Consultant: Aw man, that means we have to wear real clothes!
Mount Laurel, New Jersey
Overheard by: I hate that
Jen: Today is Leonardo Da Vinci’s birthday.
Beth: Really? I guess he’ll be going out to dinner with Gisele Bundchen. Oh wait, they broke up, didn’t they?
Jen: […]
Sylvan Way
Parsippany, New Jersey
Overheard by: Karen
