Cleaning lady, about deaf cleaning guy: I'm hiding up here from Tim–he wants me to help him clean that suite downstairs before the new company moves in. I don't wanna help him, cuz he never listens!
Columbus, Ohio
Cleaning lady, about deaf cleaning guy: I'm hiding up here from Tim–he wants me to help him clean that suite downstairs before the new company moves in. I don't wanna help him, cuz he never listens!
Columbus, Ohio
Shift supervisor: What are you doing?
Intense coworker: Working on my sparkle.
Shift supervisor: Your what?
Intense coworker: Once I sparkle, all the girls will want me! (turns to female coworker) C'mon, do I dazzle you?
Wellington
New Zealand
Overheard by: Still Not Dazzled
Office girl: No one go in the ladies’ room. The Bathroom Bomber strikes again.
1520 Front Street
Yorktown Heights, NY
Overheard by: miss earwell
Food court employee #1: I think I have a lizard tail growin’ out of my butt!
Food court employee #2: Oh, I see it!
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Woman to coworker: Why is it called a short story?
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Mike
18-year-old guy: How old do you think Brenda* [older lady from office] is?
20-year-old guy: About… fifty two?
18-year-old guy: I’d hate to be that old and still wear make-up.
Willenhall
West Midlands
England
Receptionist: You guys.
Co-worker #1: How old are you today?
Co-worker #2: Hell, if her skin is anything like the rings of a tree…
Office: …
Co-worker #2: What?
1490 Francis Drive
Daytona Beach, Florida
Office guy #1: Does anyone know of, like, a Mexican dessert?
Office guy #2: Why?
Office guy #1: Oh, my wife is having a Mexican-themed party and I have to think of a dessert.
Office guy #3: Flan? I think that is Mexican. I don’t know what it is, though…
Office gal: Flan is nasty. It has a nasty texture. Flan is like the texture of a rotten cooter.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: I don’t like flan either…
Guy in jeans and flip flops walks into office at 11 a.m. and high-fives two employees on the way.
Newbie in suit: Dude, he’s totally pulling an Office Space. We better watch him — he might set the building on fire. Or start gutting fish at his desk.
Cube dweller: Okay, first of all, that was Milton who set the building on fire, not Peter Gibbons. Second, it’s Casual Friday, which is probably why he’s dressed like that. And third, he doesn’t work here.
Insurance office
Long Island, New York
