30-something coworker to staff member’s nephew: So, you can get weapons… Can you also cast spells and do magic?
Nephew, playing a medieval computer game: Yeah. That’s called ‘Religion.’ Some people get really into religion, but I don’t. I just like killing stuff.
University of Sydney office
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Wil Dog
Coworker #1: Man, it’s cold in this room.
Coworker #2, pointing to thermostat: If you’re cold, blow on that.
Coworker #1: What’s that going to do for me? [Pause.] If it will make me warm, I’ll blow anything.
Broad Street
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Coworker #3
Male employee #1, at lunch, peeling a banana: So, I'm doing a detox diet, where I eat only fruit for two weeks, and a bit of meat is introduced during the third. It's rough, but I'm actually starting to feel more sprightly.
Male employee #2: I say…it really works? I should try it. I'm knackered, and I'm getting a paunch. I'd like to detox that baby from my midriff.
(thin, lovely, female coworker, clutching mug of coffee, enters lunchroom)
Male employee #2: Sophie, what do you do to keep fit? Do you eat fruit at breakfast, perhaps?
Sophie, taking sip of coffee: I believe for breakfast I had beer and chocolate biscuits.
High Holborn
London
England
Overheard by: Mr Tickle
Coworker #1, whispering: They’re firing Lily* on Friday!
Lily, standing behind coworker #1: Why!! What did I do!
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Rite Aid employee #1: My friend died last year, he was really sick, it was sad.
Rite Aid employee #2: Yeah man, my friend from high school recently passed away too.
Rite Aid employee #3 (in a Dominican accent): Yeah, that happened to my friend too. Actually, he did not die. Someone killed him.
Rite Aid
New York, New York
Overheard by: Marie Ziskin
Female Excel nerd: Time to go make more price lists! Excel is my bitch.
Redheaded dominatrix: And you are mine.
42nd Street
New York City, New York
Loud guy in lobby: I mean, I love sharp knives a lot, but not that much. That’s just too much!
495 Metro Place South
Dublin, Ohio
Overheard by: Wondering How Much Is Too Much
Woman: I thought I was a smart person, but no, I’m not.
175 S. Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
Colleague, typing important serious e-mail to client: Ooops! I typed “sorry for any incontinence!”
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: PMSL
Female coworker: Why do you shake your mustard like that?
Male coworker: To mix it up real good so I don’t get the pre-mustard on my sandwich.
Female coworker: I am never eating lunch with you again.
West Lexington Street
Baltimore, Maryland
