Employee: Do you always have to act like a child?
Manager: This company is all about innovation. And studies have consistently shown that the most innovative thought comes from the ages of five and under.
31601 Pacific Hwy South
Federal Way, Washington
Director: Thanks for all your help on that project.
Peon: No problem…It’s not like I had a choice.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
VP:I swear to God, the assistant at [DouglasCo] is so stupid.
Admin: Hey, even stupid people need jobs.
Coworker: Yeah. Some of them even make it to VP.
388 Greenwich Street
New York, NY
CIO: So, we’re okay now?
Manager: No, we still have problems, but they’re higher quality problems.
5000 Ellin Road
Lanham, Maryland
Overheard by: Cantabile
Architect #1: She’s an artist.
Architect #2: No, she’s crazy.
515 Canal Street
New York, NY
Overheard by: Emma B
Receptionist: What did you think of that visiting speaker? He was kinda cute!
Engineer: What a dork!
Receptionist: So he was a dork by dork standards? Wow!
ASU Engineering Center
Tempe, Arizona
Programmer #1: How do I turn on logging in the web application?
Programmer #2: Talk dirty to it.
5450 Tech Center Drive
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Boss: What are you still doing here? I told you to go home early.
Employee: I know. Have you ever seen Shawshank Redemption?
Boss: Yes.
Employee: Remember what happened to the prisoner that finally got his freedom? He ended up hanging himself because he didn’t know what to do with his free time.
440 9th Avenue
New York, NY
Receptionist: What are the new shirts made out?
Clerk: They’re 100% cotton.
Receptionist: Cotton? That’s the stuff that grows on sheep, right?
Clerk: No, cotton comes from rabbits. That’s why they’re called cottontails.
10 Miles South of Battle Mountain
Battle Mountain, Nevada
Co-worker #1: Didn’t you wear that shirt two days ago?
Co-worker #2: Huh? What? I don’t know…
Co-worker #1: Yeah, I remember you had that sweater on a couple of days back.
Co-worker #2: Did you look that up on www.victoriaknowswhateveryonewears.com? Oh wait, it kicks back to another site, www.gofuckyourselfvictoria.com.
460 West 34th Street
New York, NY
