Nurse #1: And I don’t know. I just started having this anxiety attack.
Nurse #2: Well, on the bright side, I just made a Klan hood for my finger.
Royal Oak, Michigan
Nurse #1: And I don’t know. I just started having this anxiety attack.
Nurse #2: Well, on the bright side, I just made a Klan hood for my finger.
Royal Oak, Michigan
Office gal: No, that goes in vertically.
Office guy: Vertically? Where? Here?
Office gal: No, in the little hole.
Office guy: What? No way!
Office gal: Yeah, you gotta fanagle it a little bit to get the gap to open up, so you can stick it in there.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: That's what she said?…
Boss to secretary: Where is Linda*? Call her, I need to evaluate her, but…
Secretary: That makes me nervous…
Sylvania, Ohio
Overheard by: jullylully
Ditzy coworker, giggling: My hair smells like Asian noodles!
Des Moines, Iowa
Coworker to another: It doesn't matter if they're juicy or dry, they all do the same thing.
Atlanta, Georgia
Super pregnant co-worker to new hire: Oh my god, it's like I can feel his face pushing up against my vagina whenever I walk!
(new hire stares in stunned silence)
Super pregnant co-worker, attempting to backpedal: Well, I mean, not all the time. But if I walk really fast then I get worried it'll mess up his face! Like, “woah, dude, what happened to your nose?” “My mom had a really heavy gait when I was in utero, man.”
New Jersey
Overheard by: So, what does it feel like when you sit?
Younger guy peon: You know, I’ve never had any experience with ladies from the Pacific Rim.
Older guy peon: Really? Well, lemme tell you something. Their hair down there is dark, straight, and soft.
Younger guy peon, thoughtfully: … Like a puppy dog’s ears?
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Beef and Ale
Guy in next cube: I told her that if she came at me like that again, I'd cut her tits off… Yeah, I seriously told her that…well, I was drinking heavily.
Warren, Michigan
Overheard by: Scared for my tits
Chick: Sometimes I chew with my mouth open just for effect.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: aireiq
Director to editor, about shot in short film: If I had done all the moves right, I would have just come on her back.
Wilmywood, North Carolina
Overheard by: Actor
