Account executive: It's Mike's birthday today!
Mike: It is not.
CEO: Oh well, time for the ritual birthday sodomy, anyway.
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: IT Dude
Account executive: It's Mike's birthday today!
Mike: It is not.
CEO: Oh well, time for the ritual birthday sodomy, anyway.
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: IT Dude
Female coworker: I kinda like the idea that I once was a sperm.
Willow Lawn
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Stacy
Older Scottish woman: The poor wee lad's 21 now, but he's still got the mind of a child.
Geordie woman: Aye.
Older Scottish woman: Still doesn't stop her taking him to all the gay clubs, though.
Geordie woman: Aye.
Newcastle upon Tyne
England
Overheard by: Finance Mole
Young guy: What, you don't like Skittles?
Slightly older guy: No, I feel like my teeth are rotting when I eat them.
Young guy: How about Starbursts?
Older guy: Nope.
Young guy to boss lady: Did you hear that? Did you know you're working near a communist?
Boss lady: You see, the fact that you care about this epitomizes why the gen Xers hate your generation.
Los Angeles, California
Blonde in next cubicle: It's especially sad when turtles get killed. I mean, aren't they like really wise and live for hundreds of years or something?
Toronto
Canadia
Manager: I remember him when he was still an exchange student, what do you call those?
Intern: Interns?
Oakland, California
Very old man: Dammit, I forgot to take my medication.
Adult son: So take it now.
Very old man: I'm supposed to take it right after meals.
Adult son: But you just finished your meal.
Very old man: I know, so I'm going to take it now.
Adult son: So you didn't forget.
Very old man: Yeah, but if I didn't remember, I would have forgotten it.
Long Beach Diner
Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
Coworker: Supposedly it's called “wanger.” You know, what people used to call each other in the 5th grade?
New York City, New York
Older female accountant: You’re looking more like Burt Reynolds each day.
Younger male accountant: He’s old, what are you saying?
Older female accountant: No, like… In a good way… When he was sexy and young.
Younger male accountant: (silence)
Older female accountant: I should get back to work.
Independence, Ohio
Editor #1: Is it fiction?
Editor #2: Yeah, it’s an adult book. I mean, regular fiction, not young adult. That always sounds so weird, adult book.
Editor #1, laughing: I know!
Editor #2: Like it was a little book that grew up!
Editor #1: … Yeah. Like that.
Murray Hill
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Rose Fox
