Professor #1: What's going on out there?
Professor #2: It's either a gang fight or a game of Red Rover.
College
West Virginia
Overheard by: Professor 3
Professor #1: What's going on out there?
Professor #2: It's either a gang fight or a game of Red Rover.
College
West Virginia
Overheard by: Professor 3
Teacher: Fix the photocopier, it’s not working.
Secretary: What did you do to it?
Teacher: Nothing, it’s just jammed, unjam it.
Secretary: Oh my god, what is that smell…what did you do?
Teacher: Nothing.
Secretary: Did you put transparencies in here? Oh my god, you did! Dude! You can’t do that! They’ll melt! This is a colour photocopier.
Teacher: I wanted colour transparencies.
Secretary: You are so demoted to mimeograph!
557 Church Street
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Worker #1 referring to a computer file titled as her name: Are you in me?
Worker #2: Yeah, I'm in you.
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: a little small
CSR: Oh, you work on computers? You probably know more than I do so this should be an easy call, huh?
25 Brooklyn Avenue
Forsyth, Georgia
Girl coworker: I'll e-mail the help desk…I'll just say “please help us, help desk.” Ahahah! I 'm so funny.
Guy coworker: Okay, good idea. You're typing all in caps.
Girl coworker: I know! That's because everything is in capitals on my computer.
Guy coworker: Um, you have the cap locks on.
Girl coworker: What is that?
Guy coworker: The caps lock key on your keyboard?
Girl coworker: Oh, no! My computer is just all caps.
Guy coworker: No, just do this. (does it) See? Now you're not in caps anymore.
Girl coworker: Oh my gosh! You are so smart! Oh! Thank you so much! Oooohhh! Let me retype my e-mail to the help desk! “Please help us, help desk.” That's so funny! “Please help us, help desk.”
Northern California
Magazine Editor: Can you help me? I think the stapler’s broken…See it’s broken because it doesn’t have any staples.
350 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Secretary: I'm getting an iPad.
Office tech: Oh, don't get one! I need to tell you all about it.
Secretary: I don't want to hear it.
Office tech: You don't want to know my opinion?
Secretary: No, you bore me, and you can't afford one anyway.
Auburn, Indiana
CSR to IT guy carrying video camera on tripod: Hey, it's tripod man!
IT guy: What else can I say but thanks!
Insurance Office
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Dadn8tr
Tech: Okay, now right-click there.
Admin: Here?
Tech: No, right-click. Right there.
Admin: Okay…
Tech: No, get rid of that. Right-click. Right there. Right-click. Right-click…Which button are you clicking?
Admin: The left one.
Texas A&M University
College Station, Texas
Stoner coworker training newbie on fax machine: This fax machine, like, never works… But I find it really helpful if you whistle the tune to Close Encounters of the Third Kind while you’re faxing… [Newbie stares.] See?! Another fax through!
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Sarita
