Professor: So we'll have lab meeting on Monday, then.
Grad student: Um, that's Labor Day, so people will probably be away.
Professor: Away? Why?
Grad student: Because it's a federal holiday?
Professor: Well, we're not federal, so we don't take federal holidays.
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Grad student: I have to scoop my boobs out of my armpit when I lay down.
Charleston, South Carolina
Male postdoc: Are you sure you can’t do this experiment alone tomorrow?
Female postdoc: I’m sure! I’ll ask someone to help! I can’t do it alone! I’m too short! Pretty! Boobs, and stuff!
Physics Lab
Hunter College, New York
Sorority girl in Spanish class: ‘Diabolico…’ That means he’s diabetic, right?
Classmate: No, it means diabolic.
Sorority girl: So, diabolic… Is that like a medical condition?
Modern Languages building, University of Arizona
Tucson, Arizona
Teacher: You should all go back in time to where I would walk in the room and you all stand up and say, ‘Hello, Professor M*!’
Student: And women shouldn’t have the right to vote!
Newton, Massachusetts
Bubbly blond college grad to incredulous admin: Boys have it so easy. Being a princess is hard!
Hopkinton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Glad I have it easy!
Tween girl #1, going through underwear: Oh my God, so I could, like, totally get the blue ones and wear them on school spirit day!
Tween girl #2: Totally!
Victoria’s Secret
Bellevue, Washington
Overheard by: Becky
Tech guy: I need to update your microscope software, have you seen the dongle?
Grad student: Um… Excuse me?
Tech guy: I need to plug the dongle in to get access to your machine.
Grad student: Uh… What would… That… Look like?
Tech guy: Oh wait, never mind, I see it. Thanks!
[Tech guy leaves.]Grad student, to undergrad nearby: What the hell was he talking about?
Undergrad: I don’t know, but I feel like we were about ten seconds away from being in a very nerdy porno.
North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Postdoc: No, my landlord won’t allow two people living in the apartment.
Grad student: But it’s just your wife living with you.
Postdoc: Right.
Grad student: But wives don’t count as people!
Carl Icahn Laboratory
Princeton, New Jersey
