Brazil

Old lady to young guy during naked model drawing class: Stop undressing her with your eyes!

553 Aspicuelta
São Paulo
Brazil

Overheard by: the model

Gay hairstylist: But people who have anal don't get prostrate cancer…
Manager: They only get hemorrhoids.
Gay hairstylist: That's true, after a while it looks like a cauliflower. But, anyway, we do not get prostate cancer, because the cock acts like a massage therapist.
Manager: Riiiiight!

Sao Paulo
Brazil

Office bimbette: Oh my god, that place is so weird. I hate going there with all those guys. I have to make sure I look really ugly when I go there.

São Paulo
Brazil

Overheard by: at least she doesn't have to try that hard…

Jewish middle-aged woman, after looking for something in her purse for a long time: It's like putting a donkey in a living room… You know, if you're a rabbi.

Bookstore
Sao Paulo
Brazil

Slutty coworker: Oh, I just joined the most fantastic group in MySpace, XYZ Friends*. It’s incredible. You don’t even have to look for men — you just join and men fly all over you.
Snarky coworker: You flaming parakeet.

São Paulo
Brazil

English teacher: Nice shirt.
Manager: Tell me about it… It’s laundry day.
Italian teacher: Oh god, I hate laundry day. I always run out of underwear and have to wear nothing under my skirt. I’m terrified that the dog will stick his face up my vagina… You know, literally.
Manager: Yeah, I don’t think there is a way to mean that in a non-literal sense.

434 Peixoto Gomide
São Paulo
Brazil

Overheard by: English Teacher #2