Intern: I’ve never had butt sex. I’m saving it for marriage. Since I’m not a virgin anymore, I have to save something for my husband.
Friend: You’re so dumb. You should have done what I did. I ONLY have butt sex, so I’m still a virgin.
Pour House Bar, Capital Hill
Washington, District of Columbia
Female shop assistant: Sorry sir, but you'll have to stand outside. These changing rooms are for women only.
Cocky Spaniard: So?
Female shop assistant: You're a man.
Cocky Spaniard: But I'm gay!
Female shop assistant: That's not really my problem, sir. Please wait outside.
Massimo Dutti Store
Dubai
Overheard by: Keep Digging!
Supervisor to manager: You know I’m leaving work early today, right?
Manager: That’s right… For what, again?
Supervisor: I’m getting my cat shaved.
(pause)
Supervisor: My cat… like, our pet cat. A feline.
Ambassador East Hotel
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: laughing one cubicle over
Employee: I just pulled up my information on the system and had a question.
Manager: You can't pull up your own information, you can pull up Sophie's, but not your own.
Employee: Oh, I didn't do anything on my file, I was just playing.
Manager: You can play with each other, just not yourselves.
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Matt Bangsund
Male coworker: The last place I danced was at a strip club!
Female coworker: I didn’t think there was a place to dance at a strip club except that one little stage, and I didn’t think they let boys up there.
Male coworker: Well, somehow I ended up there… They won’t let me in the Dells anymore!
Female coworker: Why not?
Male coworker: I had my face in places it shouldn’t have been.
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: hoping he meant the guacamole
Female cube dweller to coworker: Stop that, you don't know me well enough to bite my nipples!
Rockford, Illinois
Girl executive: I bank at Wells Fargo.
Guy executive: Oh, they charge a bunch of fees. You must like getting fucked in the ass.
Girl executive: Well…
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Intern guy: I'm trying to imagine what a masochistic society would be like.
20-something girl: …amazing.
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/08/ouch.html
Overheard by: Ian
Coworker, on phone, very authoritatively: No! The green m&m is the only woman! Nooooo!
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: There's a wealth of information in my office
