[Dead of winter.]Supervisor: Oh my god -short sleeves! Why didn’t you wear your coat?
Employee: I looked out the window and it didn’t look cold outside.
Dallas Parkway
Addison, Texas
[Dead of winter.]Supervisor: Oh my god -short sleeves! Why didn’t you wear your coat?
Employee: I looked out the window and it didn’t look cold outside.
Dallas Parkway
Addison, Texas
Office director to peon: Look what she's taking!
HR rep: I've decided to take your pink fly swatter!
Peon: Yay! Are you taking it home or to your new office?
HR rep: I think… home.
Old manager: What are you going to do with that ugly thing?
HR rep, grinning: Nothing work-related, I assure you!
New manager on first day: Wow. Huh!
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: Peon
Coworker #1: It smells like old people in here.
Coworker #2: What do old people smell like?
Coworker #3: Death and feces.
San Rafael, California
Employee to another, after going through office fridge: Hey, you're making my nuts all smelly.
Ho-Ho-Kus, New Jersey
Lady VP: At least it wasn't girl-on-girl.
Male manager: True.
Lady VP: Girl-on-girl is hard.
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: Meaghan
Cube drone #1: I took the bus this morning, and I was squashed in by this really fat woman.
Cube drone #2: (sympathetic noise)
Cube drone #1: That's the thing about taking the bus. I mean, it's really sad– poor people tend to be fat.
Washington, DC
Coworker to another: Just stick it in your pants and see how it feels!
Dayton, Ohio
Woman #2, in elevator: Be careful. Don't kill yourself.
Woman #1, stumbling on platform shoes: These shoes are no good.
Woman #2, examining them: You have socks on.
Woman #1: Yes. My feet get cold.
Woman #2, hesitant: But… you have sandals on.
Woman #1: I know. I'm wearing sandals with socks, and you've busted me before I've even gotten off the elevator.
Burbank, California
Overheard by: Urz
Employee #1: So have you heard from [Amanda] since she quit?
Employee #2: No. I called her twice but never heard back from her.
Employee #1: That’s because she’s probably bitter.
Employee #3: You’ve tasted her?
138 Greenwood Avenue
Bethel, Connecticut
Overheard by: Dawn Saunders
Cube dweller #1: Man, my daughter got the worst ear infection last night and wouldn't stop screaming.
Cube dweller #2: Wow, that's horrible, what did you do?
Cube dweller #1: My wife wanted me to take her to the emergency room but I said, “are you crazy? I just smoked three bowls and am buzzing hard!”
Cube dweller #3: Someone please make him stop.
West Palm Beach, Florida
