Receptionist: He’s not in, may I take a message?…No, we don’t have voice mail, but I’ll be happy to take a message…I write it on a piece of paper and had it to him when he comes in.
1718 Villa Avenue
Indianapolis, Indiana
Receptionist: He’s not in, may I take a message?…No, we don’t have voice mail, but I’ll be happy to take a message…I write it on a piece of paper and had it to him when he comes in.
1718 Villa Avenue
Indianapolis, Indiana
Boss, during full staff meeting: So I asked him, “why does a person need semen to mow the lawn?”
Underling, quietly, to no one in particular: Does she know that's a double entendre?
Presenter, loudly: So back to the operating budget…
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: No you did not
Manager: Why does it smell like salami in here?
Tech: I ran out of milk, so I had to have salami for breakfast.
Manager: Uhh…what?
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: fleeing from the salami stench
Boss: It was some chick college…
Minion: I have to ask, was it an Asian chick college?
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: outside laughing
Female coworker: I received your collections file for the $57,700.00 claim. Have you run an asset check on this lady to see if she has anything we can file suit against?
Male coworker: No. When I spoke to her she sounded barefoot, pregnant, and poor. Like she was living with someone else.
Female coworker: I didn't realize you could get all of that from someone's voice.
Male coworker: I'm crunk. I'm good.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: Not Crunk
CEO: So, how long will it take you to set that up?
System admin: Um…two minutes?
CEO: Five. You've got five. See, I doubled-and-a-halved it for you!
System admin, developer, designer: What?
State & Water
Peoria, Illinois
Overheard by: only girl in an office of men…
Boss to secretary: How do you know farm animals don't understand daylight savings time?
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Overheard by: CrazyCurator
Receptionist, on his last day: How can I give the rest of the staff access to these files?
Tech guy: Put them on the network.
Receptionist: Where’s the network?
Tech guy: Exactly! It’s everywhere, man!
University of Minnesota, Minneapolis
Overheard by: I’m New Here
Bossman: Were you able to answer all of her questions?
Worker: No.
Bossman: Why?
Worker: Because I didn’t know what to tell her!
9500 Owensmouth Avenue
Chatsworth, California
Cube chick: How do you love a hamster?!
11460 Johns Creek Parkway
Duluth, Georgia
