Manager to worker: Did you get some sun this weekend?
Worker, sheepishly: Yeah.
Manager with gusto: Man, you're redder than a dick on a dog!
Southlake, Texas
Manager to worker: Did you get some sun this weekend?
Worker, sheepishly: Yeah.
Manager with gusto: Man, you're redder than a dick on a dog!
Southlake, Texas
Customer: I would like to buy this box of condoms, but I want to know if I can return them if they don't work.
Cashier: What do you mean “if they don't work?”
Customer: You know! If I get pregnant!
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: OhMyGodBecky
Male security guard: Well, everything has been taken care of and everyone has been notified of the problem.
Female security guard: So our asses are covered?
Male security guard: Yes, our asses are covered.
Female security guard: But what about everyone else's asses?
Male security guard: Not a work conversation anymore.
Atlanta, Georgia
Young receptionist: So what are you wearing to the party?
Older male boss: Depends.
El Dorado Hills, California
Coworker #1: When is Lent over?
Coworker #2: Easter.
Coworker #1: If I was Jewish, I don't think I would give anything up for Lent.
Gilbert, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: notajew
Intern: Is that you who smells good and smells Italian?
Roanoke, Virginia
Woman on cell, happily: Hi! Are you divorced yet?
Tarrytown, New York
Guy in charge of van duty: You're going to be the next… (next words muffled by van engines)
Girl assisting van duty: Did you just tell me I'm going to be in epic porn?
Guy: What? No! I said “admin coord.” You're not going to go to HR, are you?
Girl: No, I'm actually a little flattered.
Marginal Way
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: porn star
Older male patient: I have been previously diagnosed with glaucoma, cataract and immaculate degeneration.
Doctor: Uh, do you mean macular degeneration?
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Barry
Boss in special activities division: The short answer is: it's classified.
Bearded man: What's the long answer?
Boss: The long answer is: it's classified, and I don't like you.
CIA Headquarters
Langley, Virginia
Overheard by: John Alejandro King
