Daughter-in-law cooing over another shopper’s baby: Awww — look at that face!
Mother-in-law: You’ll have one of your own soon.
Daughter-in-law: [Snorts] Talk to your son about that.
Mother-in-law: Well, that’s between the two of you, I think.
Daughter-in-law: You know how I am. If I don’t get what I want, I just go out and get it myself. Remember how I wanted a kitten?
Oxford Valley Mall
Langhorne, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Fellow shopper
Worker #1: …True dat, dawg.
Worker #2: I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you are white.
1400 Walnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attorney: Maybe we’ll get lucky and there’ll be a murder.
County courthouse
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Lan
COO: So my son, his sisters have started dressing him up in their clothes and their mother's high heels. I'll come home and he's clomping around in those shoes, and jewelry and a dress!
Openly gay office manager: That used to happen to me too!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Manager to another: Why don’t you take a seat on my commode? It’s fur-lined… It’s a special otter fur. The poop washes right off.
101 North 2nd Street
Harrisonburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Andréa Cecil
Social worker to passing ambulances and police cars: Shut up! God.
260 South Broad Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: lora
Coworker #1: So I have decided that I'm only going to do work when the boss is in the office.
Coworker #2: Haha! That is so awesome!
Coworker #1: I feel like it's only fair, if she isn't going to be here working, why should I work?
Coworker #2: I agree, she is the captain of this ship, after all.
Coworker #1: And, if I'm forced to do work, for example take a telephone call, I will document the time so that in the future I can make up that time back by not working.
Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Surgeon: So, you’re dating a nurse… What kind?
PA #1: Beats the hell out of me… I’m just hoping she’s a head nurse — you know, with dirty knees.
PA #2: Awesome.
Hospital
Western Pennsylvania
Female HR manager: I got so drunk last night, I slept in just my socks!
Disinterested female coworker: Ummm, good for you?
Female HR manager: It's one of my levels of drunkenness. It means I'm really drunk.
Disinterested female coworker: Okay.
Female HR manager: You know why I picked this long dress to wear today?
Disinterested female coworker: Ummm, no, why?
Female HR manager, proudly: Because I could skip the underwear!
Horrified female coworker: (silence)
Female HR manager: I think I might still be drunk.
Horrified female coworker: I'm starting to wish I was.
Great Valley, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: everybody has their freak flag
Co-worker: So I said to myself, “Oh look, the bathrooms in building 12 have yellow tiles.” Then I saw the urinals.
1110 American Parkway NE
Allentown, Pennsylvania
