…Oh And, by the Way, I Know What You Were Doing in the Bathroom Earlier.

Receptionist: A patient just tried to cancel her appointment that's in two hours. Said she was stuck in Dallas. I told her we didn't have any openings for a month.
Coworker: Why? We have openings tomorrow.
Receptionist: Because she's not in Dallas, she called from home. Caller id, helloooo. She'll be here…

Dental Office
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Caller ID…hellloooo

Posted on March 28, 2015
Coworkers, Lies, Offers and requests, On the phone, Receptionists, Texas

That's What the Recordings Want You to Think

Service rep on phone: Yes, ma'am, I can find a salon near you. What is your zip code?
(sound of five beeps as woman keys in her zip code)
Service rep: Ma'am, could you speak your zip code, please?
(five beeps again)
Service rep: Ma'am! You are on the phone with a human being! Tell me, using your words, what you zip code is! (pause) Thank you, no, I'm not a recording!

Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: Another Rep

Posted on March 26, 2015
Customer Service, Customers, Offers and requests, On the phone, Technology, Texas, Weirdness

And the Occasional Puppetry, Of Course.

Man on phone: I'm having surgery next week. (pause) I'm having penis enlargement surgery. (pause) Yeah, but I don't really use mine much anymore. It's good for taking a whiz, and that's about it.

Salt Lake City, Utah

Posted on March 26, 2015
Body Parts, Employees, Health & Hygiene, On the phone, Utah, Weirdness

And Could You Describe to Me What She's Wearing?

20-something male cube dweller on phone: Hi, this is…hello? (pause) Oh, wow. No, sorry, I just heard your tone of voice and thought I should have been paying 4.99 for the call. (laughing) Is your mom home, or is she on her way here?

CRPC
Leeds
England

Overheard by: cubenerdery

Posted on March 23, 2015
Employees, England, Family, On the phone, Questions

I Paid Extra for That, Too

Coworker to colleague, after phone call: I don't like that ring tone, it just sounds like a woman is breathing down my trousers…

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Mr. Blackwell

Posted on March 23, 2015
Compare and contrast, Coworkers, On the phone, Pennsylvania, Sensory Experiences

Baby Hercules Surprised Everybody

Man on cell: He put you into a headlock and gave you a noogie? (pause) You realize our son is eight months old? (pause) Okay, almost nine months but still he can barely move his fingers, let alone put you into a headlock.

Founders Plaza
East Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Bamber

Posted on March 23, 2015
Age and ageing, Connecticut, Default, Family, On the phone, Questions, Weirdness

11AM Conference Call

Employee #1: Okay, we’ll send an intern over, then.
Employee #2 on speaker: That’d be great. Do you have any Asians?

250 Park Ave South
New York, NY

Posted on March 21, 2015
Coworkers, New York, On the phone, Questions, Race

I Think I’ll Keep Him

Female agent on phone: You gonna have supper ready when I get home? I don’t care… Fine, chicken. Fried chicken. Whatever, get your ass in the kitchen and make me some fried chicken. Just shut up and go make me some chicken, I’ll be home in an hour [hangs up]. My husband is so whipped.

Evans Building
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Going Gay