Lawyer on phone: My understanding is that he works in a restaurant, not a bordello.
Huntington, New York
Lawyer on phone: My understanding is that he works in a restaurant, not a bordello.
Huntington, New York
Developer on phone with admin: Yeah, just add it to the list. The account name is 'consumer', password 'buttfucker'. Thanks.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Mr. the Snake
Customer: What price tickets do you have available?
Call center rep: $70, $60, and $35.
Customer: Okay…(long pause) What tickets do you still have though?
Call center rep: Um…70 dollar tickets, 60 dollar tickets, and 35 dollar tickets.
Customer: Okay… (pause) But how much are the tickets that you have left?
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Kathy
Woman on phone: He saw some pornography on the internet and went to school and touched some girl and got in a lot of trouble.
Birmingham, Alabama
Overheard by: your D.A.D.
Male salesperson on phone to female customer: But I can't do that. I can give you a six-inch white one or an eight-inch brown one. I don't have an eight-inch white one!
Majestic Parkway
Bedford Heights, Ohio
Guy on phone: Slim-Fast doesn’t work if you eat half a cake every night.
Stratford, Connecticut
Wireless tech support: Could you pull the battery from the phone?
Customer: I didn't realize these things had batteries.
Millbury, Massachusetts
Dispatcher to supervisor: The customer on the phone is pissed off and talking about canceling all her services.
Manager, walking by: It's because we suck!
San Francisco, California
Exasperated boss on phone: Well that's great, Jake. Maybe I should go downstairs and slam my head in the car door a few times.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Staff: Hi, this is Happy Toddler, Inc.*, how can I help you?
Customer: I bought these Happy Toddler baby wipes yesterday and instead of a single wipe you’d expect to be protruding from the center so you can pull them out, this one I got had a bunch of wipes protruding out, looking like a hernia. I had to hold down the bulk of the wipes from the center. I had to get my tweezers and fish into the depths of the container and finally pull out a wipe.
Staff: Ok, ma’am. Can I put you on hold?
Perth, Western Australia
Overheard by: only hernia-ed it
