Office peon on phone: It’s got everything — sex toys, dumb people, oil companies…
Washington, DC
Overheard by: um, yeah
Office peon on phone: It’s got everything — sex toys, dumb people, oil companies…
Washington, DC
Overheard by: um, yeah
Stressed office worker, picking up phone: Thank you for helping, may I hold you?
Greensboro, North Carolina
Employee on phone with a French company: I’m sorry that you’re offended that I don’t speak French, sir…Well, I don’t know what to tell you. I speak English and Korean; I just don’t speak French. We have a great offer here. I think you’d like to hear about it, even in English…Well, if you’d like I can speak to you with what French I do know but I’m afraid it will only be “hello” and “yes” or “no.”…I’m sorry that you think my lack of French represents what’s wrong with America in general…
61 Broadway
New York, New York
Engineer on phone: Even skanky girls need love too. And I'm single, so I do my part to help.
Grayslake, Illinois
Coworker, examining scratched up phone: Life is rough in my pocket.
Vancouver
Canadia
CSR: Thank you for calling Widgets Inc.* How may I help you?
Customer: I’m calling about my bill.
CSR: OK, which bill are you calling about?
Customer: The one I received.
3445 North M-291 Highway
Independence, Missouri
Coworker on the phone: Once I stabbed myself in the leg with a knife, and my husband made me a BLT sandwich.
Butler, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Benjamin
IT manager on phone: You’re right, ma’am. Yes, that is entirely our fault. We should have explained that you’ll need to have a computer to teach a course online.
Denver Tech Center
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: rev_matt
Irate boss on phone: What?! You're holding my order because of a past due invoice for $100? We spend thousands with our vendors! This is ridiculous! $100?! I wipe my ass with $100 bills!
San Carlos, California
Research supervisor on phone: So, question — monkeys. Apparently one got a rash during the drug trial, but no one noticed because she was really hairy. Yeah, really, really hairy. She’s a hairy monkey. What do you know about that?
West Point, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alison
