Local cable company exec: Does Dish or Direct TV offer service in our area?
Mesquite, Nevada
Local cable company exec: Does Dish or Direct TV offer service in our area?
Mesquite, Nevada
Cashier: And what form of payment will you be using today?
Customer: Money.
Robb Drive
Reno, Nevada
Project manager, reading e-mail from vendor: Hey, Travis*! What the fuck is this?
Travis*: Oh, yeah, that guy. He's like the fuckin' Mr Rogers of switchgear. Always with the “have a great day!”
Project manager: Hmm…
Travis*: And I'm all “you've got $140,000 in liquidated damages, so shut the fuck up, bitch, and get me my stuff!”
Fallon, Nevada
Overheard by: trippin on DayQuil
IT guy, running cable in new cubicles: Knee burns… I was feeling that last night.
Sex Toy Company
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess
Front desk agent #1, entering bathroom: What are you girls doing? We have a line of guests!
Front desk agent #2: I'm trying to poop and can't concentrate because of her poop problem.
Front desk agent #3: I'm not responsible if she dies, I warned her from the beginning.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: LasVegas
IT guy: You know why sardines are so good? Because their bones are young and soft.
Mesquite, Nevada
Co-worker #1: Do you have a dog?
Co-worker #2: No, I have a hard enough time taking care of myself, let alone another dog.
2645 South Mojave Road
Las Vegas, Nevada
Eastern European cocktail waitress: So what is this “stepping up to the plate” you spoke of in our meeting?
Bar manager: It’s an analogy…OK, it’s like this: in baseball, you step into the batter’s box. You step up to the plate to try and hit a home run. That’s what we need, is home runs here.
Eastern European cocktail waitress: I don’t understand your speech at all.
Bar manager: Great! Now I’m going to have to explain what an analogy is.
Bourbon Street Casino
120 E. Flamingo Boulevard
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: KellyMarie
Company president/daughter of founder: Does the the mail really need to go out so early? I have a hard time getting in here by 10.
Mesquite, Nevada
Overheard by: Didn't win the genetic lottery
Anthropology teacher: Yes, and when you see human remains… Actually, I have some bones in my car…
(class in stunned silence)
Student #1: Really?
Anthropology teacher: Oh, I always have bones in my car… I think I have some baby bones, too.
Student #1: I hope you never get pulled over.
Student #2: They'll think you're a serial killer!
Anthropology teacher: Well, I love dead bodies! I'll exhume you, I'll exhume him, I'll exhume your grandmother! I'll exhume anyone! (pause) Let me go get them.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: He really is adorable, not creepy.
