Gosh You're Deep, Elaine!

Office lady #1, yawning: I don't know if I should get a coffee too, I just had a smoothie.
Office lady #2: Wouldn't you rather pee a bit more but yawn a lot less?

Calgary
Canadia

Posted on February 9, 2011
Advice, Canadia, Employees, Health & Hygiene, Meals and Snacks

Yesterday It Was My Banana Hammock

Foreign male coworker, returning from lunch: Hey, look at my apple bag! Want some?
Female coworker: Nah, they look rotten.
Foreign male coworker, saddened: Stop making fun of my apple bag!

Fort Washington, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: HRuncomfortable

Posted on February 2, 2011
Coworkers, Feelings, Meals and Snacks, Offers and requests, Pennsylvania

Best Hooker Name Ever.

Cube dweller: Come early. Bring cheesecake.

Pennington, New Jersey

Posted on January 28, 2011
Employees, Meals and Snacks, New Jersey, Offers and requests, Relationships

Is There Something on My Face?

HR to employee: Did you eat my muffin yet?

Marlborough, Massachusetts

Posted on January 28, 2011
Human Resources, Massachusetts, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Weirdness

Best. Parent. Ever.

Coworker on phone: Are you sitting down? Okay… I need you to understand you do not feed dog food to your sister. What you did was not okay. Your punishment is no iPod, no computer, no television, you are grounded to your room. You love to write, right? Well, I want you to go to your room and write a story of two sisters who love each other, but one sister was mean and tricked her sister into eating dog food. This sister must apologize to her sister that she tricked, and to mom and dad. You will read this story aloud.

Silicon Valley
California

Posted on January 20, 2011
Animals, Coworkers, General Idiocy, Meals and Snacks, On the phone, Relationships, Weirdness

When Pastry Chefs Go on a Third Date

Female billing agent on cell: Girl, you should have seen me on Saturday I was sweatin, I had cake all in my hair… I. Was. A. Mess.

Delran, New Jersey

Overheard by: Bruce Banner

Posted on January 20, 2011
Employees, Meals and Snacks, New Jersey, On the phone, Weirdness

There's Some Leftover Horse Cutlet in the Fridge

40-something coworker: I have a headache. I need a meat sandwich.

Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Maybe you should post on Craigslist

Posted on December 24, 2010
Coworkers, Diet & Weight, Meals and Snacks, Oregon, Possible Sexual Harassment

…But Resourceful People Call It Both!

Older female customer: I found this in a pair of pants. What is it, some kind of seasoning?
Clerk: Well… Some people call it a seasoning. Other people call it “marijuana.”

Salvation Army
Ithaca, New York

Posted on December 1, 2010
Customers, Employees, Meals and Snacks, New York, Questions, Substance Use & Abuse, Words

This Conversation Is Ova.

Patient: Are there are any restrictions to take after having my injections?
Nurse: Do not eat beef.
Patient: What about eggs?
Nurse: Eggs are okay.
Patient: But eggs are from cows…

Beverly Hills, California

Posted on November 30, 2010
Animals, California, Health & Hygiene, Meals and Snacks, Nurses, Patients

That Means It Was Good for You!

Art director, after particularly greasy lunch: Uhhh. My fingers smell worse than it tasted.

Boulder, Colorado

Overheard by: the new guy

Posted on November 29, 2010
Body Parts, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Designers and Photographers, Meals and Snacks, Sensory Experiences

Meals and Snacks