Worker #1: Who’s that?
Worker #2: What, the new temp?
Worker #1: Oh. What happened to the other lady?
Worker #2: She was too over-qualified.
Worker #1: What, and the new guy’s not? What is his experience?
Worker #2: Well, he was a turd farmer from poor Virginia.
Des Moines, Iowa
Employee on phone: How’s the weather there? Is it sunny?
Speaker: It’s raining.
Employee on phone: Oh. So is the sun shining?
Des Moines, Iowa
Coworker, on phone with husband: Well, I think they fell out of my… (pause) That's alright, there's a lot of shit to clean up.
Iowa City, Iowa
Overheard by: Shocked and Awed
Not so bright coworker: Yeah, I'll probably let my daughter get a tattoo when she turns 16… If she really knows what she wants. I'll even pay for it.
Des Moines, Iowa
Overheard by: coolerthanme
Male employee #1: What did you bring for lunch today?
Male employee #2: A salami sandwich.
Male employee #1: That's it? You can't just have salami as your main meat! You can garnish with salami, but you have to have other meat.
Des Moines, Iowa
Barista, handing cup over to customer: Are you a coffee drinker?
Starbucks
Des Moines, Iowa
Office girl on cell: Come on, Mom, you know how I feel about socks!
621 East 9th Street
Des Moines, Iowa
Office girl #1: My son's girlfriend gets sandwiches that are just bread and cheese.
Office girl #2: Just bread and cheese?
Office girl #1: Yep, just bread and cheese.
Office girl #3: No bread? Just cheese?
Office girl #1: Bread and cheese.
Des Moines, Iowa
Overheard by: B Frazier
Customer: So where in the instruction manual does it tell me to save the receipt?
Customer Service Rep.: You’re kidding me, right? You mean to say that you have to be told to save your receipt?
Customer: Yes, I do.
Customer Service Rep.: So, if you were to go out and buy a roll of toilet paper, it would have to say “Tear here, wipe there” or else you wouldn’t know how to use it? Because both are pretty much common sense, sir.
835 41st Street
Des Moines, Iowa
Overheard by: christiana (while doing remote observations on customer service calls)
Counselor: I'm sure he's a nice kid, but he looks like a beaver.
Decorah, Iowa
Overheard by: skm
