Lady on phone: Hey, it's Allison. Do you know if there is a website where you can see if someone has an outstanding warrant out for them? (pause) Can you look online and find one? (pause) You know my husband's name, right?
Florida
Overheard by: Scared In Orlando
CSR: Any possible combination of fetish can be googled and is on the net for free. I mean, if you want to see shit on a midget while he is playing with teddy bears…it's there!
Aliso Viejo, California
Boss: You sent me that attachment on e-mail but I need the paper version.
Underling: So print out the attachment.
Redmond, Washington
Overheard by: Really?
VP: There is a reason why advertisers do not target user-generated content. They do not want their ads being placed next to naked women. With casual gaming and chess videos, they know what they get. Unless you have nude chess games…and in that case, I need to learn how to play.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Sabotage
Crotchety supervisor, holding up printed copy of e-mail: You two are computer nerds. What does this mean? (points at an emoticon)
Analyst #1: It's a smiley face.
Crotchety supervisor, turning the paper sideways: Oh, I see the colon is the eyes and…what the hell is wrong with you people? (crumples up e-mail and walks away)
Analyst #2: Have a nice day!
Oakland, New Jersey
Overheard by: >:(
Adoptions manager to executive director: Can I talk to you while you're googling?
Gulfport, Mississippi
Overheard by: Foster Care Goddess
Man #1, discussing peanut usage in Asia: Peanuts are not native to Asia! The peanut was invented by George Washington Carver!
Man #2: That is completely false! You cannot invent a peanut, you can only discover it, and that happened way before George Washington Carver…he invented peanut butter.
Man #1: Listen, I am not a man of pride, but I know this much: George Washington Carver was a good man and he invented the peanut by using cross-breeding! This is what I have been told my whole life!!
Man #3: I'm googling that business right now. (uses BlackBerry) Wow, that man was obsessed with peanuts!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Someone clearly struck a cord with this topic
Tech support rep: Okay, so go ahead and type in the url in the address bar.
Customer: Okay, uh, um, should I be on the internet?
Tech support rep: Yes.
Customer: Okay. Um. Okay. So uh, should I google “internet”?
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: loves three way calling and the mute button
Coworker: Oh, what a cute baby! Maybe you'll have a baby that cute!
Pregnant coworker, looking at pic of cute baby on internet: I'm not counting on it.
Coworker: Ummm…why?
Pregnant coworker: Have you ever noticed how the most attractive people always have the ugliest babies? Yeah, I am not having a cute kid.
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Noodle
