Social worker: Crap! I spelled “I am” wrong!
Chicago, Illinois
Social worker: Crap! I spelled “I am” wrong!
Chicago, Illinois
Boss: Let’s take care of that tomorrow.
Employee: Let’s as in “you and me”, or “you, me and [Kate]”, or “me and [Kate]”?
Boss: Let’s as in “you and Kate].” I shouldn’t be involved unless there’s a problem.
303 East Wacker Drive
Chicago, Illinois
Nerd #1: All Brittney* talks about is food and sex.
Nerd #2: Yeah, what do you think she likes doing more: talking about eating while having sex, or talking about fucking while having lunch?
333 Pfingsten Road
Northbrook, Illinois
Overheard by: deltar
Straight developer to gay developer: Don’t go straight! Your mom may have raised a homo, but she didn’t raise a quitter!
State & Water
Peoria, Ilinois
Overheard by: only girl in an office of men…
Office chick on phone: I know! He was all, ‘I really like your hoses…’ I did — I told him I liked his hoses as well — I’m not rude.
Itasca, Illinois
Overheard by: Terry
Admin to another: Zombies would never happen, god wouldn't allow it.
Schaumburg, Illinois
Bike messenger #1: Hey, you race at all?
Bike messenger #2: There's no glory in racing. The only glory is on the streets.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Just Let Me Sign for This
Boss: I would totally be in a movie about farting!
Lincoln Park
Chicago, Illinois
Two co-workers watch a woman showering in a window across the street.
Female co-worker: Is she dry showering?
Guy: No, there’s soap on her legs. Wow, those are America’s cleanest boobs.
Female co-worker: You can’t see soap from here.
Male co-worker: You can with the binoculars in my office.
Male co-worker runs to get the binoculars.
Female co-worker: Uh oh. She just cleaned somewhere funny.
Boss: What’s going on?… Ahh, a nudie with fake boobies! I love a good set of fake knockers!
Male co-worker: She has a scar on her butt.
Boss: I think that’s a tattoo.
Female co-worker: She should get that checked out.
225 North Michigan
Chicago, Illinois
Client: Wait, so what do you mean I can use my debit card. How does a debit card work? Do you like, just write it in your check registry?
Stylist: Yeah, it’s like a check, only electronic. You have to use your PIN number.
Client: I’ve never seen this before! Wait, I don’t know my PIN number.
Stylist: It’s the same as your ATM number. It’s the same thing.
Client: …This is amazing!
110 East Delaware Place
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: phone girl
