Female cubicle dweller on phone: Without those steroids, I'm not even functionable.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Functional Coworker
Female cubicle dweller on phone: Without those steroids, I'm not even functionable.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Functional Coworker
Coworker #1: Yeah, I didn't wash my shoulders afterwards.
Coworker #2: Trust me, it was worth it.
Los Angeles, California
Analyst: Look, you said you broke two bones in your e-mail, but you actually just broke your arm.
Boss: Yes, I broke my bone… now I have two bones!
Analyst: No! You have two pieces of one bone now. Bones are treated as a whole. You're trying to get extra sympathy. If I break a pen in half, how many pens do I have?
Boss: Two!
Analyst: How are you my boss?
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Marketer In Accounting
Woman in elevator, pointing to sonogram picture: What is that?
Man showing the sonogram: Oh, she is holding his testicle.
Dallas, Texas
Male coworker, sipping from mug: I love peppermint tea!
Female coworker, also sipping from mug: Peppermint tea makes me fart.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confusedbutamused
Loud chick: Why bother callin' it a vacation day when you can just call in sick?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Grunt #1: Hey, Stan*! How are you, man?
Grunt #2: Well, my liver hurts.
Baltimore, Maryland
Pregnant coworker: Are you allowed to drink when you're breastfeeding? Is it just like when you're pregnant?
Distraught coworker: Why are we mammals? Why can't we just lay eggs and drink beer?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Sarah R.
Employee #1: Why are you pulling all of those nuts off the shelf?
Employee #2: They were recalled because of the salmonella outbreak.
Employee #1: Oh. I didn't know there was peanut butter in those nuts.
Ohio
Overheard by: Sofa Kingdom
Police officer (signing to the tune of Animal Crackers in My Soup): I like maggots in my soup…
Police Department
Randolph, New Jersey
