Woman: Oh, I want the baby. I just don’t want the pregnancy. If I could just go to a fast food place and order a baby, I would.
4910 16th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Woman: Oh, I want the baby. I just don’t want the pregnancy. If I could just go to a fast food place and order a baby, I would.
4910 16th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Worker: What’s up with Charlotte*? Is she okay?
Supervisor: I honestly don’t know.
Worker: When I was pregnant, I worked all the way up ’til I dropped the load, and then I came back. Kids these days…
1 Easton Oval
Columbus, Ohio
Coworker, on phone with husband: Well, I think they fell out of my… (pause) That's alright, there's a lot of shit to clean up.
Iowa City, Iowa
Overheard by: Shocked and Awed
Female cubicle dweller on phone: Without those steroids, I'm not even functionable.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Functional Coworker
Coworker #1: Yeah, I didn't wash my shoulders afterwards.
Coworker #2: Trust me, it was worth it.
Los Angeles, California
Analyst: Look, you said you broke two bones in your e-mail, but you actually just broke your arm.
Boss: Yes, I broke my bone… now I have two bones!
Analyst: No! You have two pieces of one bone now. Bones are treated as a whole. You're trying to get extra sympathy. If I break a pen in half, how many pens do I have?
Boss: Two!
Analyst: How are you my boss?
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Marketer In Accounting
Woman in elevator, pointing to sonogram picture: What is that?
Man showing the sonogram: Oh, she is holding his testicle.
Dallas, Texas
Male coworker, sipping from mug: I love peppermint tea!
Female coworker, also sipping from mug: Peppermint tea makes me fart.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confusedbutamused
Loud chick: Why bother callin' it a vacation day when you can just call in sick?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Grunt #1: Hey, Stan*! How are you, man?
Grunt #2: Well, my liver hurts.
Baltimore, Maryland
