Cubicle dweller: Yeah, I never lick envelopes anymore… Not since 9/11.
Providence, Rhode Island
Cubicle dweller: Yeah, I never lick envelopes anymore… Not since 9/11.
Providence, Rhode Island
Woman: So if you’ve never done it before, it’s going to hurt the first time and maybe even bleed a bit.
Man: Uh huh.
Woman: So don’t be afraid. You should try it. It’s definitely worth it.
Other people in elevator shuffle uncomfortably.
Woman: Um…So flossing is crucial to good dental hygiene.
Elevator
Houston, Texas
Coworker #1: You know, shoot them with shotguns, like with tranquilizers.
Coworker #2: Bang! Bang! (makes shotgun motions)
Coworker #3: That's how the doctor put in my IUD.
Omaha, Nebraska
Coworker #1: Everybody, breathe in!
Everyone, after breathing in: Why?
Coworker #1: I just farted!
Virginia
Overheard by: I wish I had not listened
Peon #1: Yeah, that guy is a real jerk.
Peon #2: What you need is some jerk repellent. Some jerk-be-gone, or some jerk-off. Oh, wait…no.
San Francisco, California
Suit, walking out of conference room: Poop in my hand! Poop in my hand!
Bank of America Tower
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: bigwig's secretary
Boss #1, about candidate: He's special.
Boss #2: Good, he's really good at business processes then?
Boss #1: No, I mean he's special.
Boss #2: Oh, like short bus special.
Denver, Colorado
Coworker to another who just took a bite of his lunch: Oh great, now I have your DNA in my mouth!
West Chester, Pennsylvania
Sales manager: Sometimes I think I’m having a panic attack. And then I realize I just have to poop.
Nashville, Tennessee
Co-worker on phone: Oh, man…Yeah, if you have HIV, you should definately stay home…Okay, see ya Monday.
Co-worker #2: So who has the HIV?
Co-worker #1: Oh, [Paul]’s got the flu and strep or something.
2300 West Plano Parkway
Plano, Texas
Overheard by: Lauren
