Male manager to female employees: The black currant vanilla separates the men from the boys.
Idaho
Male manager to female employees: The black currant vanilla separates the men from the boys.
Idaho
Teacher: Hugh*, why are you out in the hallway? You should be in the classroom.
Student: Well, I had skidmarks in my underpants so, you know, I was putting them away…
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: another teacher
Office observationalist: It sounds like someone is pooping in the walls.
Cambie & Hastings
Vancouver, BC
Canadia
Overheard by: Martha
Coworker #1: I got the hiccups from eating a pretzel the last time I was at a Pacers game.
Coworker #2: You got the hiccups from eating a pretzel?
Coworker #1: Yeah, all that bread… and I was drunk.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Boss from other room: The most expensive coffee in the world, and…
Database monkey, yelling: Is that the kind that's shat out by monkeys?
Boss: No, leopards!
Austin, Texas
Employee: I have to leave, my mother’s bleeding.
Manager: Again?
Employee: Bleeding somewhere down there [gestures below waist] — she’s not sure where.
Manager: What kind of doctor do you call for that?
Rochelle Park, New Jersey
Female coworker #1: I really need to cut back on my caffeine.
Female coworker #2: Yeah, me too.
Female coworker #1: No, I really need to stop. Whenever I go out with my running group, I always need to pull over and shit in the bushes. Y'know, because of the caffeine.
Female coworker #2: (tries unsuccessfully to hide disgust)
Female coworker #1: What? It's totally natural.
Male coworker: Why can't there be more men in this department?
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Had to stop eating my lunch
Peon: Oh my god! Who made the coffee?
Secretary: I did. What's wrong with it?
Peon: This stuff is like liquid crack!
Secretary: You're such a sissy. You added half a cup of blueberry creamer!
Peon: Seriously, I think I'm having chest pains. Call 911!
Bangor, Michigan
Overheard by: Love my coffee
Lady #1: My dad doesn’t have crabs anymore.
Lady #2: Oh, really?
Lady #1: Yeah, they all died.
Lady #3: Like pet crabs, right? Otherwise that’s a little too much information.
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Who would know that about their dad!?
Confused coworker: I think I'm intuitively dyslexic.
Burbank, California
Overheard by: urzzz
