Worker: I will bring the estimate in to you once I have taken my medication! Geez!
830 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Worker: I will bring the estimate in to you once I have taken my medication! Geez!
830 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Office peon to others: What do you do if you're conjoined twins with only one ass and the other twin keeps farting blood and you want to wear white pants?
Quebec City
Canadia
Overheard by: Frank
Cube dweller to office: I used to enjoy getting dirty… Once upon a time…
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confused but amused
Worker getting up from corner of a desk: Oh my god, I think I sat on a nerve… My penis is numb! You know the technique “the stranger” where you sit on your hand?
Coworker: Yeah.
Numb worker: This is the opposite of that, it's like I have someone else's penis in my pants right now.
168th Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Lab worker packing specimens to send to reference lab: Wow! I don't have any gonorrhea or chlamydia today!
Kokomo, Indiana
Brunette office girl: She's off sick today, she has a cold.
Blonde office girl: But how did she get a cold when it was so hot yesterday?
Sydney
Australia
Young professional woman: I have to pee.
Young professional man: Me too.
Young professional woman: Race you to the handicapped bathroom!
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Dan
College recruiter: I don't feel like I drink too much, but I certainly feel like I get hungover too often.
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: i feel that.
Person #1: My vagina is as fucked as the Gaza strip.
Person #2: Can I suggest a nice Jewish gyno?
Person #1: I don't want her to colonize my vag. Monistat will work just fine.
Person #2: You could just shove some Challah bread up there and have the yeast go to town on your sorry ghettoized crotch.
Boston, Massachusetts
Co-worker #1: Hey, are your balls getting hot?
Co-worker #2: Quite.
Co-worker #1: I hear a hot laptop kills your sperm.
Co-worker #2: I’m all for it. I smoke the seeds, too.
1759 T Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Brendan B
