Female 30-something coworker: I know after my c-section, I never got my feeling back down there.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: confused by those parts
Female 30-something coworker: I know after my c-section, I never got my feeling back down there.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: confused by those parts
Employee #1: I waxed my chest last night, and I didn’t have any more tape so I tried using duct tape.
Employee #2, laughing uncontrollably: Wait, wait, wait! I thought the punch line was “I waxed my chest last night”?!
Lynchburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Mike Oxlong
Customer: I don't know if I should get the two years subscription, I might not live that long.
Employee: How old are you?
Customer: 68.
Employee: Well, Tom*, that's a crapshoot.
Harrisburg, North Carolina
Coworker #1, reading article: ‘Morphine is highly addictive…’
Coworker #2: Morphine is not addictive.
Coworker #1: But it says right here in this encyclopedia article–
Coworker #2: —Morphine is not addictive.
All other coworkers: It says right here!
Coworker #2: Morphine is not addictive! I know this for a fact!
Lunch break
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Worker #1: My roommate has this book about all the kinds of poops you can have and what it means about your health.
Worker #2: Kinds of poops?
Worker #1: Yeah, like floaters, sinkers, clean poop…
Worker #2: Clean poop?!
Worker #1: The kind that slides right out and leaves your butt clean.
Worker #2: That should be called “perfect poop”.
Loyola Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Office cougar: I figure I'll just overwhelm him with great sex and he'll completely forget he's allergic to cats!
Reading, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: princess pink
Awkward coworker: I kept throwing up over and over, but that wasn't my main problem…
Santa Monica, California
Co-Worker, reading email: Can you believe this shit?! The nerve! “For those over 50, special healthcare benefits.” Over 50! How can they send me this shit and…Oh, there’s a free lunch. [Pause] Well, maybe I’ll go.
Trinity Place
New York, New York
Worker #1: Did you hear me? I just said I hit my knee on the window.
Worker #2: But there are no windows in your cubicle.
Worker #1: I know, I meant chair.
Worker #2: Hey [worker #3], did you hear [worker #1]? She said window but meant chair.
Worker #1: I also meant arm not knee.
Worker #2: Wait, so when you said, “I hit my knee on the window,” you really meant,”I hit my arm on the chair?”
Worker #1: Yeah.
Worker #2: You’re beautiful.
Rt 31, Illinois
Coworker #1: My palms are sweaty. What do you think that means?
Coworker #2: It means you’re annoyed.
Coworker #1: Really?
Coworker #2: No, I guess I was just projecting.
330 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
