Female coworker, threatening another female coworker: Well, if I get a fucking yeast infection, you’re going to be the first to hear about it!
6th & Maple
Spokane, Washington
Female coworker, threatening another female coworker: Well, if I get a fucking yeast infection, you’re going to be the first to hear about it!
6th & Maple
Spokane, Washington
Fat manager: I'm sweating Diet Coke and doughnuts.
Charlottesville, Virginia
Well-dressed 30-something woman: So my son was like: “Mom! There’s this ball in my privates and it’s moving around!” So I told him to talk to his father because I want nothing to do with this conversion. So he says: “Dad! There’s this ball in my privates and it’s moving around!” and my husband goes: “Yeah -’cause those are your balls. Women have boobs and men have balls and those are your balls! End of story.”
Slightly horrified 20-something woman: Don’t you think that will ultimately confuse him?
30-something woman: I know, right?! Anyway, it was so funny… [Laughs] Balls!
Providence, Rhode Island
Male coworker to another: As a man, have you ever had your nipples get sore from your shirt rubbing on them?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Amelia
Drone #1: Every time Tina* leaves her office, I pop in there and rat out a fart.
Drone #2: Dude!
Drone #1: When she made me work the weekend, I pissed in all her plants and wiped my ass on her mouse pad.
Circle Center Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Coworker #1: Ugh. I don't feel like being at work today.
Coworker #2: I know. Don't you ever wish you could just fall out of bed in the morning and break both your legs so you could take a sick day?
Chicago, Illinois
Middle Manager: He wanted to talk about organic augmentation.
Boss: Did you tell him yours was large enough to be one?
2076 South Street
Quantico, Virginia
Female 30-something coworker: I know after my c-section, I never got my feeling back down there.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: confused by those parts
Employee #1: I waxed my chest last night, and I didn’t have any more tape so I tried using duct tape.
Employee #2, laughing uncontrollably: Wait, wait, wait! I thought the punch line was “I waxed my chest last night”?!
Lynchburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Mike Oxlong
Customer: I don't know if I should get the two years subscription, I might not live that long.
Employee: How old are you?
Customer: 68.
Employee: Well, Tom*, that's a crapshoot.
Harrisburg, North Carolina
