Geography & History

Bewildered call agent: No, ma'am, “Seattle” is not spelled with a “c,” if it were it would sound like… “cattle.”

Yakima, Washington

Overheard by: Moooo

Supervisor: I wonder if we could get her to move back here. What's keeping her in Austin?
Worker: She has a boyfriend.
Supervisor: Come on! You can get dick anywhere!

Dallas, Texas

Admin #1: Do you know how to spell Kazakhstan?
Admin #2: I didn’t even know it existed.

79 Wellington Street W
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Guy: That person I just talked to was so nice. He sounded so relaxed, and people from New York never sound like that.
Woman: He’s in Miami.

228 East 45th Street
New York, NY

Coworker: King Tut's tomb didn't make you sick, moron, it was eating all the testicles!

Dayton, Ohio

Flight attendant, as plane lands: JetBlue airways would like to welcome you to Boston, where the local time is approximately 9:50 and the local temperature is approximately cold.

Logan Airport
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: he was right

Female co-worker: My uncle just bought a condom in Brooklyn. It’s a real nice place.
Male co-worker: Really?
Female co-worker: Uh huh.

99 Church Street
New York, New York

20-something chick: Was it Colorado?
20-something dude: Yeah, that sounds right. There were a lot of unicorns.

Auburn, Massachusetts

Girl standing in smoking section: So he found this video of this dumb blonde girl. I can't believe it, she was from Norwegian or something like that.

Evans, Colorado

Overheard by: Princess

Boss on speaker phone: So I need you to give me those files, like, in five minutes.
Employee: Um.
Boss: I’m serious. I want them in my hand in five minutes.
Employee: You know that I work at home, right?
Boss: So?
Employee: So I live forty-five minutes away from your so-called “office”…Speaking of which, did you ever get that toilet out of the hallway?

3207 Hayloft Court
Frederick, Maryland

Overheard by: Ren