To Coin a Phrase

Maintenance worker: I'd rather owe a dead man 30 dollars.

Chapel Hill, North Carolina

Posted on August 23, 2011
Death, Employees, Money, North Carolina, Philosophy

…Or Just Jealous?

Worker #1: Jane* is leaving. Not to a different job, just to figure stuff out.
Worker #2: I wonder where she's going…
Worker #3: Well, she could move. She has no family. No kids. No husband or partner.
Worker #4: Oh, then maybe she's just going to go kill herself.
Worker #1: I think she just saw Eat Pray Love.
Worker #2: Are you guys being sarcastic?

Reston, Virginia

Posted on August 18, 2011
Coworkers, Death, Family, Gossip, Questions, Virginia, Weirdness

Your Editors Wouldn't Believe This If One Of Us Hadn't Once Done It

Guy on phone with one finger stuffed in his ear: I didn't get it, Lisa, what's your dad dying got to do with us not having anal? (pause) What? No sex at all? (pause) Not even a blowjob? Jeez, I mean, why are you acting so weird all of a sudden?

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Saagar

Posted on June 17, 2011
Death, Employees, Family, New York, On the phone, Questions, Relationships, Sexuality, Weirdness

Normandy Is Portrayed Quite Differently in World Whore II

Journalist in network newsroom: Ewwww! Corpses on the beach! (pause) Oh, never mind. They were just prostitutes.

Manhattan, New York

Posted on May 24, 2011
Death, Employees, New York, Physical Appearance, Sensory Experiences

…According to a Jury Of My Peers, Anyway.

Cube-dweller to manager: Jeez, Daniel*, you would have killed me! Except I would never have owned up to it, but I can now, coz I didn't do it…

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: confused but amused

Posted on May 12, 2011
Australia, Death, Employees, Feelings, Violence

I Think I Saw This Episode Of SVU…

Anthropology teacher: Yes, and when you see human remains… Actually, I have some bones in my car…
(class in stunned silence)
Student #1: Really?
Anthropology teacher: Oh, I always have bones in my car… I think I have some baby bones, too.
Student #1: I hope you never get pulled over.
Student #2: They'll think you're a serial killer!
Anthropology teacher: Well, I love dead bodies! I'll exhume you, I'll exhume him, I'll exhume your grandmother! I'll exhume anyone! (pause) Let me go get them.

Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: He really is adorable, not creepy.