Woman: Don, can you hang this on the wall, because you are tall?
Man: I hate being tall… People are always asking me to do things. Maybe next time I drop a coin I will ask a midget to pick it up.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Woman: Don, can you hang this on the wall, because you are tall?
Man: I hate being tall… People are always asking me to do things. Maybe next time I drop a coin I will ask a midget to pick it up.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Coworker: Whoever invented coffee was amazing!!
Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: thought God did that?
[In a crowded computer room]Female: Dude, nobody in here even likes you.
Male: I have made love to everyone in this room!
West San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: CCRadio
Chick: I never understood the design of that thing, but I've had it in my mouth a thousand times.
Dude: Yeah, me too.
Dental Office
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: I've never had it in mouth
Paralegal #1: I’m not sure what’s going on with the boxes, they kind of keep me in the dark about these things.
Paralegal #2: Yes…they do treat us like mushrooms.
200 Park Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: GJG
Co-worker #1: How do you spell “pseudo”?
Co-worker #2: S-U–
Co-worker #1: That doesn’t seem right. Is there an H?
270 Sylvan Avenue
Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey
Co-worker #1: I hate not having a stapler.
Co-worker #2: But you have a stapler. It’s right there.
Co-worker #1: But I don’t have a stapler.
Co-worker #2: Are you Zen or something?
Co-worker #1: What do you mean?
Co-worker #2: It’s very Zen to have/not have a stapler.
551 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Suit #1: He was an okay analyst and he knew a lot about the markets, but–
Suit #2, interrupting: –So what was the problem?
Suit #1: Well, he was from the South so he couldn’t write very well.
110 Wall Street
New York, New York
Cube girl on phone: And I’m having a really bad day. I just licked an interoffice envelope.
New York, New York
Coworker #1: I don't want Grant to see my notes.
Coworker #2: You did say “notes,” right? Not “nuts”?
Jenkintown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: It was a universal sentiment.