State rep #1: What's up?
State rep #2: Living the dream!
State rep #2: It's actually more nightmarish.
Columbus, Ohio
State rep #1: What's up?
State rep #2: Living the dream!
State rep #2: It's actually more nightmarish.
Columbus, Ohio
Female coworker #1: So, what do you think about Henry?
Female coworker #2: He’s an odd egg, but a good egg — at least when he’s not licking people.
Wausau, Wisconsin
Conductor #1, over PA: This is Stamford; welcome to the President's Club. (pause) Maybe you'll invite me someday.
Conductor #2, over PA: I doubt that's gonna happen.
Conductor #1: True.
Stamford, Connecticut
Overheard by: wasn't invited either
Co-worker: So I was at the deli, and I asked for a third of a pound of meat. I asked the lady twice. She then gave me 1.5 pounds of meat. I said, “Excuse me, this isn’t a third of a pound.” Then she said,
“Yes, it is.” Then I said, “No, it’s not.” So then she turns and asks her co-worker behind the deli counter how much a third of a pound is, and her co-worker replies, “Oh, a third of a pound is .75.”…This is why I hate the South.
115 Perimeter Center Place
Atlanta, Georgia
Woman: Sam* is a big cookie ho, and I’m the cookie monitor, and Lynn* is the cake finisher–
Sam, from next cubicle: –There’s cake?!
Congress Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kitty
Coworker, testing e-mails: I got a funky one in my junk!
Corporate Park Drive
Herndon, Virginia
Co-worker: This is absolutely draining. Now I have a headache and want to go home and cuddle up with my blanky.
6277 Sea Harbor Drive
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Nicole Pickering
Guy #1: Have you ever been caught masturbating in the bathroom?
Guy #2: What?! No, of course not!
Guy #1: Oh, okay… Good spot, ain’t it?
Antwerp
Belgium
Overheard by: meneither
Coworker #1: I can get news from all 52 states!
Coworker #2: Uh… there are only 50 states.
Coworker #1: Duh — Alaska and Hawaii!
Chelmsford, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Must’ve missed that one in geography…
