Worker on phone: Hi, Amy*, this is Emily* in editorial. Are you new back there?
IT chick: Yeah.
Worker: Okay, well, I’m having a problem with my phone. I just got a new phone with a caller ID screen on it, but when I get calls the screen is blank. Is there some button I have to push, or…?
IT chick: Well, why don’t you try unplugging the phone and then plugging it back in. I’ll stay on the line.
Worker: Um…
120 West 1st Avenue
Mesa, Arizona
Overheard by: Big Ideas
Advisor guy: You just gotta remember–you can't jump jumbo.
Austin, Texas
Drone: Just shave your bum fluff off and stick on your face!
Canberra
Australia
Boss: Why didn’t you have a cover letter on the copy to the client?
New employee: I didn’t know I was supposed to have one. I didn’t think to ask if I needed it.
Boss: From now on, if you don’t know the question, you should ask it.
1700 66th Street
St. Petersburg, Florida
Maintenance #1: Don’t break ’em off.
Maintenance #2: Don’t break what off?
Maintenance #1: These nuts.
224 South Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Lesbian: Whatever it takes to get her pregnant. Even if I have to participate!
1250 Broadway
New York, New York
Receptionist: What happened to your light?
Worker: The switch broke off.
Receptionist: Well, how can you work in the dark? Are they going to fix it?
Worker: [Chris] went to shut off the fuse so that he can work on it.
Receptionist: Here, I’ll fix it.
Worker: Stop it, you’ll electrocute yourself!
11 Broadway
New York, NY
Teacher: If you wish to have a discussion, raise your hand and I will call on you if you are worthy enough.
Student: I love you?
140 Brandies Road
Newton, Massachusetts
Male employee: Do you know what you really need right now?
Female employee: I need coffee.
Male employee: No, you really need to get laid. Now.
419 Lafayette Street
New York, New York
Employee #1: You’re making a mess with the mail. Envelopes are all over the place. They’re calling me to come clean them up.
Employee #2: They’re calling you? What are they saying?
Employee #1: “Come clean me up. I’m strewn about the table.”
Employee #2: …Because evelopes have such a good vocabulary.
Employee #1: Of course they do. That’s why they don’t stay sealed. They’ve got a lot to say.
12100 I-40 East
Amarillo, Texas
