Co-worker #1: Wanna go in, say…10 minutes? Or do you need longer?
Co-worker #2: How about 15?
Co-worker #1: I knew that was what you were going to say!…I think I wasted my wish when I said, “I’d like to know what people are
going to say, right before they actually say it.”
1835 Terminal Drive
Richland, Washington
Male VP: We'll beat it off for now.
Female general counsel: We'll beat it off for the next five years.
Consultant: That's probably the longest we can beat it off for.
Female general counsel: And then I'll retire.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: If I so much as smile, I'll get fired.
HR: So maybe I can do all three of you in the morning.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Boss: Why hasn’t the mail come in yet?
HR: We have a new postal carrier and she hasn’t come in yet.
Boss: Is she nice looking?
HR: Well, she’s inconsistent. Sometimes she delivers at 2:30, sometimes it’s 1:00.
Boss: What has that got to do with how she looks?
HR: It doesn’t. Welcome to HR.
81 Apsley Street
Hudson, Massachusetts
Analyst: Is it past 6:30 yet?
Associate: Yeah, it’s almost 7.
Analyst: Great, I can go back to my cubicle and fart in peace.
1200 F Street NW
Washington, DC
Production manager: All I’m saying, Betty*, is do something, even if it’s wrong!
8900 Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Nikki
Employee: I just sent you that email with the summary of all the outstanding issues on the project.
Boss: Thanks. Could you write a summary of that email?
111 3rd Avenue S
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Career woman: Last year I couldn’t even spell consultant, and now I is one.
Two Penn Plaza
New York, NY
Overheard by: Michelle Sydney Levy
Co-worker #1: So, do you get Columbus Day off from school?
Co-worker #2: No, we only get holidays for black people and Jesus.
6101 Broadway Street
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: Salena Arledge
Boss: Does anyone need this 2005 calendar?
Grunt: No thanks; my time machine is broken.
414 South Main Street
Independence, Oregon
