Co-worker: If saliva was poison, she’d be a snake, right?
Man: Is that really your inbox, or is it some kind of joke?
Man: I’ll go punch a bunch of buttons. If that doesn’t work, I’ll unplug it.
10877 Watson Road
St. Louis, Missouri
Co-worker: If saliva was poison, she’d be a snake, right?
Man: Is that really your inbox, or is it some kind of joke?
Man: I’ll go punch a bunch of buttons. If that doesn’t work, I’ll unplug it.
10877 Watson Road
St. Louis, Missouri
Woman on cell: Well, when I get to my office, I’ll turn on my computer and run through what you did, to see what may be wrong with your computer. [pause] No, Mom, I can’t get onto your computer from my computer.
3301 Fairfax Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Secretary: This photocopier is broken.
Office service staff: Why, what's it doing?
Secretary: Well, I tried to make a color copy, but it came out black and white.
Office service staff, looking at original: Um, your original is black and white.
Secretary: Yes, I know, I thought it would insert color onto it.
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Legally Retarded
Boss: Do we have Google installed on our internet?
IT guy: We put it on your machine yesterday.
700 W. Van Buren Street
Chicago, Illinois
Person in cubicle: Is that your cell phone?
Person in next cubicle: No, it's my mouth.
Austin, Texas
Tech support: Can you tell if it’s an Ethernet cable or a phone cable?
Customer: How do I tell?
Tech support: Well, if you hold it up to the cable attached to your phone and you look at the plug, if it looks the same, you’ve got a phone cable. If it’s bigger, it’s probably Ethernet.
Customer: Oh cool. Let me look.
Tech support: WAIT! [dial tone]
711 Boylston Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Coworker #1: Do you want this document spf-ed?
Coworker #2: Do mean pdf-ed?
Coworker #1: Yeah, why, what did I say?
Coworker #2: Sfp.
Ellicott City, Maryland
Coworker: The back door isn't working.
Receptionist: Oh, yeah, the card thing isn't working. It'll be fixed soon.
Coworker: How do we get into the lab from the outside, then?
Receptionist: You'll have to use the door on the other side and go around. Sorry for the incontinence.
Lancaster, California
Intercom: This is an announcement: check your phones to see if they have a dial tone. If they don’t, call Administration and let them know.
Valhalla, New York
Overheard by: jb
Boss to IT guy, looking at server cabinet: I noticed you cleaned it up when you put the new server in–it looks a lot better. Wait, where's the new server?
IT guy, pointing at small-form tower: Oh, it's there, tiny little thing, but it does the job.
Boss: Are you sure that's a server? It looks like a UPS to me.
IT guy: Uhhhh…
Caboolture
Australia
