My Liver Was Getting Too Full Of Itself

Office manager to HR manager: Did you go to the gym yesterday?
HR manager: No.
Office manager: Why not?
HR manager: Because I went home to drink.

Langley
Canadia

Posted on July 7, 2009
Bosses, Canadia, Drinking, Human Resources, Questions, Sports

For the Last Time, You're Supposed to Pass the Bar

Attorney: It's not so cold out.
Secretary: Is that why your nose is bright red?
Attorney: No, that's because I've been drinking.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: amused intern

Posted on July 7, 2009
Admins, Body Parts, Colors, Drinking, Lawyers, Massachusetts, Questions, Weather

They Are Truly Our Unsung Heros

Woman at table with large group: We had so much fun on vacation with the kids.
Man next to her: Wouldn't it have been more fun without the kids?
Woman: What? Why, don't you like kids?
Man: Nah, not really. I've never liked kids. I don't know how pedophiles do it.

Restaurant
Detroit, Michigan

Overheard by: PeterG

Posted on July 6, 2009
Coworkers, Family, Michigan, Out to Lunch, Questions, Sexuality, Vacation

But First, Could I Get a Demo?

Boss lady: Okay, does anyone have any suggestions on how to overcome this problem?
Underling: (makes an appropriate suggestion)
Boss lady: Interesting. It's possible that your square peg might just fit into my round hole. (pause) No. I'm not going to say it.
Underling: Ummm…I think I'm going to be sick.

Mississauga
Canadia

Overheard by: TCon

Posted on July 6, 2009
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Canadia, Questions, Sexuality

Did You Check the Freezer?

Man on cell: Where the hell is my box of mustaches?

Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: CarnivorousGnar

Posted on July 3, 2009
On the phone, Physical Appearance, Questions, Texas, Weirdness

They Tend to Cut Into My Boob-Watching Time

Admin on phone with engineer: Hello, it's me. (pause) At the desk. (pause) I know, what are you wearing? (pause) Haha…okay, we need to end this conversation, because I do not need to go to a seminar.

Boston, Massachusetts