I Assumed You Needed Drugs

Elderly woman: Help me! Help me!
More elderly woman: What do you need?
Elderly woman: I need help!
More elderly woman: Then I can’t help you.

Pueblo, Colorado

Overheard by: WorkingForTheElderly

Posted on July 3, 2015
Colorado, Customers, Default, Employees, Offers and requests, Questions, Weirdness

When Affirmative Action Goes Wrong

Office lady, peering into the copier: Ew, how many white ones did I produce? Oh, good. Not that many.

1819 NW Everett Street
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Schmoozer

Posted on July 2, 2015
Dumb Employees, Oregon, Questions, Technology

Ironing Their Bandana Collection Is Monopolizing My Time

Manager: Did you watch Top Model last night?
Analyst employee: I can’t until the lesbians come back -I’m house sitting.

Empire Boulevard
Burbank, California

Overheard by: Statja K

Posted on July 2, 2015
California, Coworkers, Default, Employees, Questions, TV

This’ll Be Much Better Than Celeryfest

Male cube monkey #1: Are you excited about the spring dinner tomorrow?
Male cube monkey #2: Yeah man! It’s at a steakhouse.
Entire room: Steak! Steak! Steak! Steak!

Canal Park
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Posted on July 2, 2015
Coworkers, Cubicles, Default, Employees, Feelings, Massachusetts, Meals and Snacks, Questions

Even After I Gave You That Backrub?

Smarmy boss to teenage peon: How are you doing, Veronica*?
Teenage peon: I hate you passionately!

Plymouth, Michigan

Posted on July 1, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, Feelings, Michigan, Questions

If I Say Yes, Will It Get Me to the Front Of the Line?

Hair stylist lady, picking up next client name and looking around waiting area filled with middle-aged men: Okay, I have to ask this. (reads from sheet) Paris?
(no response)
Hair stylist lady, reading again, even more incredulously: Peaches?

Supercuts
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Captain Craptacular