Real Estate Agent: So she totally knows this guy that’s on The Real OC; he’s a loan guy that she used to work with.
Loan Rep: What character does he play?
Real Estate Agent: He’s a loan rep.
Loan Rep: I know, but what character does he play?
22342 Avenida Empresa
Rancho Santa Margarita, California
Sales assistant #1: My dad came over this last weekend and wormed Annabelle for me.
Office manager: Why did your dad have to do it?
Sales assistant #2: Is this your aunt?
Office manager: Don’t you just give her a pill?
Sales assistant #1: No, you put it up her… poo.
Sales assistant #2: Ummm…
Sales assistant #3: It’s an animal, Ed*!
Sales assistant #1: My dad wormed Josie, too. He has to put the medicine up the dog’s tushy.
Sales assistant #2: Ohhh, okay, I thought this was her aunt. I’m okay now.
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Cube rat #1: Oh! (inhales deeply) I love that smell! Do you smell it?
Cube rat #2: No. What smell?
Cube rat #1: Skunk! I love the smell of skunk!
Cube rat #2: It is the middle of winter…there aren't any skunks this time of year.
Cube rat #1: You know, you're right. Hmmmm, I wonder…
Cube rat #2: I just farted.
Cube rat #1: Are you kidding me? You mean I have been standing here enjoying your fart?
Cube rat #2: Um… (pause) Yeah, guess so!
Fairbanks, Alaska
Coworker to intern: Are you sure they're not taking you out there to kill you?
Los Angeles, California
Cubicle dweller #1: John* needs to talk to you.
Cubicle dweller #2: Just give him my IM.
Cubicle dweller #1: He just wants you to reply to his e-mail, did you read his e-mail?
Cubicle dweller #2: No, I just got here.
Cubicle dweller #1: Why didn't you read it?
Cubicle dweller #2: I just got here! I just got here! I just got here, man.
Cubicle dweller #1, mumbling: I just got here, why do you got to look at me like I'm a fucking idiot.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: the girl who cannot hear
Employee #1: I wonder who put these chocolates on my desk.
Employee #2: I put my money on the easter bunny.
Employee #1: Yeah, the easter bunny…at this point in my life I’ll even take farm animals into consideration.
360 Hiatt Drive
Palm Beach Gardens, Florida
Uber-friendly coworker: Do you ever find that your asshole hurts after you sneeze?
101st Street and Jasper Avenue
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Coworker: Well, we just need to nip this in the booty.
Colleague: “Nip it in the booty?”
Coworker: Yeah, some people get offended when you say butt.
Coral Springs, Florida
Overheard by: Sesame
Woman #1: What are you doing for New Year's?
Woman #2: I don't have any plans yet, what about you?
Woman #1: Probably just sit at home and drink some wine.
Woman #2: Yeah, I did that last year, and I accidentally got completely bombed in front of my son, so I'm not doing that again.
Manhattan, New York
Office supervisor: Could you please send our new price list to our office in Kuala Lumpur?
Receptionist: Is Kuala Lumpur a real place?
Office supervisor: Oh my god! (laughs, then leaves)
Receptionist, to other office colleagues: Why did he laugh at me?
Colleagues: You have got to be kidding!
Belmont
Western Australia
Australia
